An Exercise in Resourcefulness

Posted on October 24, 2012May 25, 2014 by Sandi Amorim 12 Conversations

“You want what you want, whether or not you think you can get it.” – Robert Fritz

How do you need to be thinking to go after your dreams and produce results?

All human behaviour is the result of state, so the first requirement is to be in a resourceful state, ie: a positive mood.

And when you’re not, you need to consciously choose it.

Because the truth is most of the time you have a choice.

Staying in a negative spin and doing nothing is a choice. You know it doesn’t feel good, but in the moment of choosing you’re doing the best you can.

How do I know? When you have better options you make better choices. I’m saying that not to let you off the hook for being responsible in your life, but rather to encourage you to have compassion for yourself when hindsight reminds you of a less than stellar choice you’ve made.

And it’s not about never having negative feelings. That’s ridiculous; everybody goes there sometimes. The key is not to stay there.

So the power then lies in choosing a resourceful state.

Continue reading →

How To Stay On Task

Posted on September 27, 2012April 16, 2014 by Sandi Amorim 24 Conversations

Imagine this scene: You want to get fit and you have joined your local gym with a view to setting up a fitness regime toot suite.

You have all the best intentions and just know that this time you really will follow through with the promises you have made to yourself!

Just to make especially sure though, you have even entered all your intended gym visits for the following month into your planner so as to remove your usual excuse of not having time.

And there’s no messing around because the first time you have scheduled is tomorrow immediately after work.

The only problem is you have no way of knowing how you will feel tomorrow after a long days work. You may feel great and pumped at the thought of pumping iron. Or indeed you may not.

Then tomorrow comes and it’s an insanely hectic day with work. You have no time to even take lunch and your expected leaving time of 4:00pm becomes 5:30pm.

Not that that is a problem or reason to not go because you know your partner will happily start dinner in your absence. You have nothing to rush home for that can’t wait until you have had some much deserved ‘you time’.

What do you do?

If you’re like most people, here is the answer to that question.

Continue reading →

Toot Your Horn, Loud & Proud

Posted on April 8, 2012April 16, 2014 by Sandi Amorim 43 Conversations

What might happen if you acknowledged your gifts openly?

Would your lizard brain raise its head and demand silence or. . .would it allow you to shine the way you’re meant to?

Let’s put it to the test, shall we?

I’ll go first , then you let it rip in the comments.

Things I’m deeply proud of

1. I completed an honours degree in Fine Arts with a dream of making my way in the world as an artist.

While I never made it to the New York art scene, my passion for art oozed into other areas of my life and creativity, one of my core values, was honoured.

2. Less than a year after knee surgery I ran a half marathon.

After the surgery the doctor gave me a list of things I should no longer do (included running and dancing) – I was 33 and decided to to prove him wrong.

It may not have been the smartest thing to do, but according to Sally Hogshead’s 7 Triggers of Fascination my primary trigger is rebellion (not so surprising!) so what I did totally makes sense.

3. I’ve been self-employed for almost 12 years, first as a photographer and then as a coach.

There are so many resources now to help you leave the corporate world, ditch your boring job, and design a life you love. Twelve years ago, not so much.

I didn’t come from a long line of entrepreneurs and looking back, I really had no clue how great the challenge. I just kept putting one foot in front of the other, following a vision and correcting course as required.

Credentials (or proof-that-I’m-the-real-McCoy)

1. I’m a Solution Focused Coach, on a mission to wake you up from your ‘someday thinking’.

I’ve got close to 7,500 hours of coaching under my belt (a Master Certified Coach credential requires 2,500 hours) and have worked with hundreds of amazing people over the years.

2. I am certified in NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming).

I love personal development, and one of my favourite areas of study has been NLP. Google it and you’ll find over 57,600,000 results but the definition I like the best – finding ways to help people have better, fuller and richer lives. Says it all for me.

Continue reading →

Let Them Eat Cake

Posted on November 4, 2011April 16, 2014 by Sandi Amorim 15 Conversations

If every behaviour has a positive intention, instead of flogging yourself and donning a hairshirt, why not look back and see a lifetime of you taking care of you?

Shaking your head in disbelief and doubt? I know, I hear it from clients all the time. I’m not going to lie, I even have to remind myself now and then.

But think about it like this for a moment. . .

You wouldn’t keep doing the things you do unless there was value for you in there somewhere. You just wouldn’t.

The stuff you do that feels good ==> positive intent.

ie: You buy organic because it’s healthier for you and better for the environment, which leads back to you feeling good.

The stuff you do that you suffer about ==> positive intent.

ie: You ate the stale cupcake because in that moment you felt sad about a friend that passed away recently, which lead to a need for comfort and the cupcake reminded you of your mom and how she used to bake treats for you as a kid (comfort), which leads back to you feeling good.

See? Positive.

Whether it looks healthy and organic or iced and stale. . .all positive.

Are you getting this?

That’s why everything you do is self-care in some way.

Continue reading →

Intending for Good

Posted on October 24, 2011October 23, 2012 by Sandi Amorim 15 Conversations

Consider that every behaviour has a positive intention.

Once you’ve let that sink in, you’ll then start to see that everything you do is self-care in some way.

For in that moment of choosing, you are caring for some part of yourself, perhaps meeting an unspoken need.

No matter how strange or inappropriate your behaviour may seem in hindsight or to others, it makes perfect sense in the moment you choose it.

This is not the truth, but when you act as if it is, it becomes an empowering statement of belief.

The key is to appreciate the positive intention of the behaviour.

This doesn’t mean you have to agree with it or even like it. It’s just that there’s an opportunity when you look past the behaviour and focus on the intention. I promise, you’ll find one every time.

“There are days I drop words of comfort on myself like falling leaves and remember that it is enough to be taken care of by my self.” – Brian Andreas

As you look back over the past three weeks and our focus on self-care, what can you now acknowledge?

My guess is you may have been judging and assessing your actions and/or follow-through. Not necessarily new or empowering thinking, is it?

Why not act as if everything you’ve done (or not done) has had a positive intention?

Instead of judging where you are, shift to the positive. There’s always a gift if you rein in your impatience.

And since it’s all made up anyway. . .make up something good here, OK?