On Owning Your Truth

Posted on October 10, 2012May 25, 2014 by Sandi Amorim 15 Conversations

The dream…

A Roman theatre filled to capacity.

Me, waiting backstage for the cue to walk out and introduce the keynote speaker.

And then…

I become the keynote.

I look out, afraid – not of speaking, but of not getting the words right.

Afraid that my message will be unclear.

That is terrifying.

And then…

I wake up, heart racing, message choking me in its intensity.

Everyone has a truth, uniquely their own even if the message is not yet clear.

Your work is to first, own that truth and then discover how to share its message.

“A kernel is hidden in me, a spark, a thought, I am life from eternal life.” – Hermann Hesse

My truth – I am a waker, here to rattle your cage. Even though, quite often you pretend there is no cage.

It’s not always comfortable, but that matters less than owning your truth.

For in owning what has been with you, a part of you your whole life, you claim that which is yours alone.

Yes. You have your truth.

Maybe you resist it, or make it wrong preferring another truth.

Someone else’s truth is compelling. Yours might seem hard or impossible in comparison.

“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” – Aristotle

I can relate, for my truth carries the weight of “Who the hell do I think I am?”

I am a waker. I own it, even though the message is still a work in progress.

You are born with your truth, and when you think back over your life you’ll find evidence for its existence.

Times when you were reprimanded for speaking it.

Times when you felt crushed by the weight of it.

Times when you knew without a doubt you were here to share it.

It’s why you’re here.

And since this is not a new message I am conscious of the truth and the irony.

You have a kernel of truth inside, longing to be expressed in a way that only you can deliver.

Right here, right now, share it.

The truth is yours, but the journey can be ours, together.

Give Your Someday a Date

Posted on September 28, 2012July 28, 2014 by Sandi Amorim 12 Conversations

When was the last time you said yes to something on your life list?

Distinction: A bucket list is considered to be a list made up of things to do before you die, i.e: ‘kick the bucket.’ A life list is made up of things to do while you’re ALIVE. And things that make my heart beat faster should be kept somewhere special. . .not a bucket.

Back to the question…when?

It’s been awhile for me too.

“This is me. And I’m imperfect and I’m vulnerable and I’m afraid sometimes…” – Brené Brown

And then yesterday, I said yes.

YES.

To something that simultaneously terrifies and excites me.

I’m going to learn how to scuba dive.

On October 17 I’ll be joining my friend and colleague Jason Sugar of Breakthrough Adventures and two others in the water.

Jason Sugar of Breakthrough Adventures teaching scuba diving.

That’s Jason on the right teaching and sharing his passion!

Here’s why it’s a big deal…

When I was 8 years old I almost drowned, and while I don’t remember many of the details, I do remember the panic and fear of not being able to breathe.

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From Someday to One Day (how shifting your focus brings a dream alive)

Posted on September 12, 2012May 25, 2014 by Sandi Amorim 25 Conversations

Someday you will die.

And that’s really the only someday thought you can count on.

The rest of your someday thoughts are like the numbered balls in an old school bingo basket. . .bouncing around, one idea on top of the other. Your dreams tumbling about willy nilly.

And therein lies the problem.

You don’t think of your dreams as possible, and you don’t give them the attention they deserve.

You mostly think of them wistfully, with a tender ‘someday, maybe’ longing.

Someday I’ll travel the world.

Someday I’ll sing on stage.

Someday I’ll be my own boss.

Each one tossed about, spinning endlessly in the basket of your mind.

Whatever your someday desire is, it’s time to get real about the fact that right now – today – it’s neglected, cushioned by the unknown and surrounded by the thousands of negative thoughts you think every single day.

From the book Happy for No Reason by Marci Shimoff:

“Our minds—made up of our thoughts, beliefs, and self-talk—are always ‘on.’ According to scientists, we have about 60,000 thoughts a day. . . And what’s even more startling is that of those 60,000 thoughts, 95 percent are the same thoughts you had yesterday, and the day before, and the day before that. Your mind is like a record player playing the same record over and over again.

Still, that wouldn’t be so bad if it weren’t for the next statistic: for the average person, 80 percent of those habitual thoughts are negative. That means that every day most people have more than 45,000 negative thoughts. Dr. Daniel Amen, a world-renowned psychiatrist and brain imaging specialist, calls them automatic negative thoughts, or ANTs.”

Basically, your someday thoughts (aka the dreams and desires you’re neglecting) are being trashed by an army of ANTs.

So, how do you stop your dream from being sidetracked by this army of negative Nellies?

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21 Quotes To Crush Your Someday Thinking

Posted on February 6, 2012October 10, 2012 by Sandi Amorim 29 Conversations

‎Today I am sharing my favourite someday crushing quotes; the ones I go to myself when I need a reminder that there is NO someday.

1. “Make today worth remembering.” – Zig Ziglar

2. “Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” – Steve Jobs

I’m with Steve on this one. Your heart really does know what you want and when you trust your intuition your someday thinking doesn’t stand a chance.

3. “Someday is now.” – Gaddy Bergmann

4. “Life’s greatest tragedy is not that it will someday end, but that most only live to follow directions and sometimes we end up totally lost.” – Alex Gaskarth

This one breaks my heart and it’s why I do the work I do.

5. “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do.” – Mark Twain

You know how I feel about regrets right? Do what you need to do to NOT have them.

6. “There are only 7 days in the week & “someday” is not one of them.” –Rita Chand

Rita is someone who lives life out loud, going after her dreams in a way that leaves someday thinking in the dust. Who do you have in your life that inspires and motivates you to action?

7. “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.” – Steve Jobs

Whose life are you living? Parents, teachers, mentors – all can inspire but they can also pull you away from your calling. Start listening to your heart instead of the voices around you. It knows. Continue reading →

Replace Your Fear

Posted on January 14, 2012September 2, 2014 by Sandi Amorim 20 Conversations

It’s time for a wake-up call.

Do you really need to have a health crisis or extreme emergency before pursuing what you want in life?

Many people live that way; it’s normal and common, but do you want to live that way?

Is it really that important to stay safe, look good, and maintain the status quo? None of those things are making you happy or fulfilling your dreams so why are they still getting so much air time?

If I could reach through the screen and give you a nudge I would. Because I’m passionate about living without regrets. And while this may seem like a rant, bear with me – I’m committed to something and I want to make sure you know it.

I’m committed to living out loud, as fully and as authentically as I can and sometimes that gets messy.

I’m OK with messy, and I’ll admit I even like to stir things up.

Occasionally someone will suggest I tone it down a bit (Do you really need to say those things, Sandi?) and sure, I could, but I don’t want to live that way.

I don’t want to live a toned down life, and I don’t think you do either.

Life gets messy. It’ll never be perfect. You’ll never get it all handled. And so what.

I’m not saying it’s easy. Some days I want to throw in the towel and take the easy path just as much if not more than you do.

But the truth is the easy path bores me to tears.

It’s not why we’re here.

I’m talking to you…the one who’s wasting your genius in that life-sucking job.

And you…the one oozing creativity in everything you do except for your work.

And you…the one who daydreams of living a life you love.

Someday. Maybe. Can you hear the death bell toll?

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Harnessing the Butterflies

Posted on September 27, 2011April 16, 2014 by Sandi Amorim 12 Conversations

Once long ago, I had a dream to do something creative with my life. As a child, I coloured, drew pictures, wrote stories and just knew that somehow that would continue to be part of my life.

At 18 I applied to art school. I wanted nothing more than to paint, even though I knew it wouldn’t be easy.

That was my first real memory of the butterflies; seized by anxiety and fear, I chose to trust and follow those elusive fluttery creatures.

But I didn’t fit the stereotype of a brooding, starving artist. I was smart, happy, in a relationship and looking forward to my future, which in the end did not go the way I’d planned.

The relationship ended and the art dream died, along with my positive outlook on life.

Bitter, cynical and more than a little jaded, I gave up my youthful dreams and joined the rat race. The stories I’d been telling myself were more real than any reality and I was stuck.

Fast forward six years; I’m sitting in a course trying to create a new future. The trying only created a headache, not a vision that inspired me in any way. The more I tried to come up with the right words, the right future, the less inspired I felt.

I sat in my chair resigned that I would ever have what I wanted in life. So I closed my eyes and I took a deep breath. Then another. I felt the pressure ease, my mind relax. I heard the voices of my group around me, but I just kept breathing.

In and out. . .and suddenly, I heard myself say, “I want to travel, meet people and take photographs.”

I looked up and people around me were smiling. At that moment I wasn’t quite sure why. It seemed insane, a pipe dream with no way of becoming reality.

But my group encouraged me to keep those words alive, even if I had no idea how to make it happen.

So I let myself dream.

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Yesterday You Said Tomorrow

Posted on September 20, 2011April 16, 2014 by Sandi Amorim 41 Conversations

Tomorrow you’re going to take that trip; you know, the one you’ve always dreamed of.

Tomorrow you’re going to write that book; you know, the one that’s been burning inside you forever.

Tomorrow is going to be the day you have fun; no really, the whole day just to play like a child.

But the days turn into weeks, and then into months.

The tomorrows add up and turn into years.

And you look back and wonder. . .

What the hell happened?

They say time flies when you’re having fun.

Ha! It also flies when you’re saving up your tomorrows.

But. . .

What if today you did something different?

What if today you took one new action?

Because here’s the thing. . .

You’ve said tomorrow far too often and far too long.

You know it’s true.

It’s time to start saying (and doing) something new.

NOW.

Like shifting from someday thinking to ==> “Hell yeah, what one action can I take today?”

Like hearing your lizard brain and saying ==> “Screw you Lizzy! I’m gonna make that call!”

Like listening to your heart’s desire and saying ==> “YES, I hear you now.”

Others have done it.

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Disarming the Critic

Posted on September 8, 2011October 22, 2012 by Sandi Amorim 1 Conversation

The Vagabondage Series: Elana Baxter on lizard busting.

I recently became aware of just how much and how often my inner critic pipes up to tell me how badly I am doing things. How much better, more productive, kinder, and more __________I need to be.

And when the critic isn’t telling me that, it’s attacking my body, eating habits, parenting, cooking and cleaning.

Be more!

Do more!

It’s a constant rant punctuated only briefly by sneaks of quiet.

I have come to the only sane conclusion that a woman experiencing this incessant haranguing can. . .

The inner critic must die or at the very least it must be sedated. Heavily.

I am tired of beating the shit out of myself. Every ounce of energy spent hating on myself, nitpicking, correcting, disallowing and crapping down my own throat!

I can’t get that energy back. And I can’t get the time back.

It’s gone. Forever.

Here’s what I do in order to allow some space and begin showing myself some love and compassion.

I disarm the voice.

You know the voice, right?

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Choosing for the Longterm

Posted on August 28, 2011October 22, 2012 by Sandi Amorim 7 Conversations

Two years ago today I chose a new life.

I went from Me to We.

I chose to spend my life with one person.

About a month before our wedding we met with a marriage commissioner who shared the wisdom gained from 10 years of marrying people.

She said agreeing to marry is a choice, the first of many. For marriage to work it takes more than love.

It takes choosing every day.

Every. Single. Day.

Choosing when you don’t feel like it or don’t want to.

Choosing through all the emotions and moods and resistance.

Resistance?

Yes, because resistance comes up any time you choose to do something that threatens the status quo, threatens the safety and security of your life.

Relationships do just that don’t they?

But they also do so much more.

They open you up in ways unexpected. Like the time Mark wrote me a love note every day for a month. Each note, cracked me open just a little bit more.

They challenge your old stories. Like the story I’d created that lived as the truth for many, many years. That story kept me single and safe.

They grow you up. After years of being single and doing whatever I wanted when I wanted, it took something for me to consider another person and their needs. There are still days I don’t want to.

And then I choose.

I choose to do the work it takes to honour our commitment.

I choose to be responsible about my feelings.

I choose to to keep choosing.

Two years ago today I chose Mark Faviell.

Creative. Intelligent. Unconditional.

When I think of what I love most about him, these three words come to mind.

I chose him.

And he chose me. We have a pact.

730 days of choosing.

With many more to come.

Happy Anniversary to us.

Quieting the Voices

Posted on August 25, 2011October 22, 2012 by Sandi Amorim 11 Conversations

The Vagabondage Series: Wherein Elana Baxter slams the door on her own personal kryptonite!

Over the last week, I’ve been engaged in a form of mental hand to hand combat.

With whom you might be asking. . .

Some of the sneakiest, most crippling villains shadowing the psyches of folks everywhere as we do our best to show up, don our superhero capes and fly out into the open air to rally for a sweet, satisfaction-filled life.

You and I know them well. They are the kryptonite of action, the Achilles heel of focused intention, and the chocolate espresso cheesecake slyly beckoning from a pastry case after a long, tough day.

Allow me to introduce my UnFab Five, a.k.a. the saboteurs of

overwhelm
judgement
perfectionism
impatience
lack of integrity

I’ve met each of these bad boys and we know each other intimately. Recently, I had the chance to chat with all of them and here for your viewing pleasure are the outtakes:

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