personal growth

On Owning Your Truth

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 15 Conversations

 

The dream…

A Roman theatre filled to capacity. the Roman Colisseum at night

Me, waiting backstage for the cue to walk out and introduce the keynote speaker.

And then…

I become the keynote.

I look out, afraid – not of speaking, but of not getting the words right.

Afraid that my message will be unclear.

That is terrifying.

And then…

I wake up, heart racing, message choking me in its intensity.

Everyone has a truth, uniquely their own even if the message is not yet clear.

Your work is to first, own that truth and then discover how to share its message.

“A kernel is hidden in me, a spark, a thought, I am life from eternal life.” – Hermann Hesse

My truth – I am a waker, here to rattle your cage. Even though, quite often you pretend there is no cage.

It’s not always comfortable, but that matters less than owning your truth.

For in owning what has been with you, a part of you your whole life, you claim that which is yours alone.

Yes. You have your truth.

Maybe you resist it, or make it wrong preferring another truth.

Someone else’s truth is compelling. Yours might seem hard or impossible in comparison.

“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” – Aristotle

I can relate, for my truth carries the weight of “Who the hell do I think I am?”

I am a waker. I own it, even though the message is still a work in progress.

You are born with your truth, and when you think back over your life you’ll find evidence for its existence.

Times when you were reprimanded for speaking it.

Times when you felt crushed by the weight of it.

Times when you knew without a doubt you were here to share it.

It’s why you’re here.

And since this is not a new message I am conscious of the truth and the irony.

You have a kernel of truth inside, longing to be expressed in a way that only you can deliver.

Right here, right now, share it.

The truth is yours, but the journey can be ours, together.

 

As It Is Spoken, So Shall It Be

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 30 Conversations

 

How many times have you heard the childlike incantation abracadabra?

A phrase used by magicians, it’s actually from Aramaic. “Avra K’davra” meaning “As it is spoken, so shall it be!”

Puts a new spin on it, for in those words is a very important message. . .

Your speaking creates your reality. 

store window, Portland, Oregon

I don’t mean that in some new agey way, or wistful longing for a someday dream.

I mean, your speaking creates your reality – how you feel, how people respond, your energy, etc.

Every time you open your mouth you’re creating.

“We do not need magic to transform our world. We carry all of the power we need inside ourselves already.” – J. K. Rowling

Speaking is generative, and every word that comes out of your mouth creates.

I’m tired. I’m busy. I can’t. 

What world did you just create?

I’ll do it. Let’s meet. I’ll figure it out!

How about now?

What if you really got the power of “As it is spoken, so shall it be?”

Now what would you say?

 

Over to You:

What do you have the courage to create in your speaking today?

 

 

Where Are You From, Really?

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 2 Conversations

 

Brian Tracy said, “It doesn’t matter where you are coming from. All that matters is where you are going.”

Yes, and when you acknowledge where you’re from with love and respect, the impact on where you’re going is profound.

 

Where am I from?

I am from a home where love and laughter reigned, a place of simple joys and comfort. giant heart stone found at Davis Bay, near Sechelt, BC

A home that prepared me for a life of connection, contribution and love; living each day fully, someday nowhere to be found.

I am from a woman, compassionate and loving, who chose a man strong and proud.

From my grandmother’s knee, oven-baked bread and rosy cheeks in the crisp wintry air.

A land, where immigrants gathered to start anew, courage and spirit to brave the elements.

A land that prepared me for western shores; where mountains and ocean collide.

 

Where am I from?

From the school of possibility; the spirit’s edge, my church the mountains and the waves below.

A place of coeur-age where risk and exploration connect.

childhood books on the shelf, photo by Sandi Amorim

Birthed in the stories of Jo March, Elizabeth Bennett, and a red-haired girl named Anne.

Where girls have heart, and spirit in abundance.

 

It’s easy to tell the stories that keep you small.

But right here as you read this, what’s the story that warms your heart?

That’s the one you should be telling.

 

From Someday to One Day (how shifting your focus brings a dream alive)

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 25 Conversations

 

Someday you will die.

And that’s really the only someday thought you can count on.

The rest of your someday thoughts are like the numbered balls in an old school bingo basket. . .bouncing around, one idea on top of the other. Your dreams tumbling about willy nilly.

Bingo Balls: photo credit - bridges&balloons

And therein lies the problem.

You don’t think of your dreams as possible, and you don’t give them the attention they deserve.

You mostly think of them wistfully, with a tender ‘someday, maybe’ longing.

Someday I’ll travel the world.

Someday I’ll sing on stage.

Someday I’ll be my own boss.

Each one tossed about, spinning endlessly in the basket of your mind.

Whatever your someday desire is, it’s time to get real about the fact that right now – today – it’s neglected, cushioned by the unknown and surrounded by the thousands of negative thoughts you think every single day.

From the book Happy for No Reason by Marci Shimoff:

“Our minds—made up of our thoughts, beliefs, and self-talk—are always ‘on.’ According to scientists, we have about 60,000 thoughts a day. . . And what’s even more startling is that of those 60,000 thoughts, 95 percent are the same thoughts you had yesterday, and the day before, and the day before that. Your mind is like a record player playing the same record over and over again.

Still, that wouldn’t be so bad if it weren’t for the next statistic: for the average person, 80 percent of those habitual thoughts are negative. That means that every day most people have more than 45,000 negative thoughts. Dr. Daniel Amen, a world-renowned psychiatrist and brain imaging specialist, calls them automatic negative thoughts, or ANTs.”

Basically, your someday thoughts (aka the dreams and desires you’re neglecting) are being trashed by an army of ANTs.

So, how do you stop your dream from being sidetracked by this army of negative Nellies?

Continue reading →

How to Break Free of a Burnout

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 16 Conversations

 

Too many people are headed for burnout. Maybe you’re one of them.

“Burnout is nature’s way of telling you, you’ve been going through the motions your soul has departed; you’re a zombie, a member of the walking dead, a sleepwalker.” – Sam Keen

Because here’s the thing – no one is immune.

I’m pretty sure even the Dalai Lama has to manage this to some degree. It’s part of the human condition, and we all go through it from time to time.

Sometimes it’s because you don’t know how to say no.

Other times it’s due to overwhelm of the awesome kind. There are simply too many great things to do, attend or take part in.

Either way, burnout is imminent.

“Just like there’s always time for pain,
there’s always time for healing.” – Jennifer Brown

If you’re too far gone down the path, you may not be able to avoid it.

The good news is, you don’t have to stay stuck there.

So grab a notebook and a pen. We’re doing this the old school way.

Ready?

 

MAKE TWO LISTS: 

List #1

Start with Danielle LaPorte’s infamous ‘stop doing’ list. 

Sit yourself down and get real.

I start with everything that’s currently on my plate – commitments, promises, projects, whatever.

Then I go through the list letting myself feel whatever energy comes up.

If my gut winces or my brow furrows, I get rid of it.

Do this with integrity.

If other people are involved, let them know where you’re at. Clean it up, repromise, change your mind – it’s all good when done in service of you being of greater service, to yourself and others.

If your gut flutters and you smile as you look at the item on the list, it’s a keeper.

It’s not rocket science. Trust your body. It never lies.

 

Continue reading →

The Cure for What Ails You

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 11 Conversations

 

Ever notice how a good laugh shifts almost any mood?

Some days it is the ONLY thing that works.

“If we couldn’t laugh we would all go insane.” – Robert Frost

Think about those moments when you really do feel crazy. Laughter releases the pressure and returns you to a more resourceful state.

A-mazing Laughter, sculpture by Yue Minjun in Vancouver's English Bay

“There is nothing in the world so irresistibly contagious as laughter and good humour.” – Charles Dickens

Similar to yawning, it’s really hard to watch someone laughing and not feel the urge to join in.

It feels so damn good. Stop resisting!

Let yourself laugh, out loud and more often!

 

“Laughter is the language of the soul.” – Pablo Neruda

The first time I attended a silent retreat I caught myself laughing as I walked through the woods on my own. It bubbled up from within and echoed through the trees.

Best. Feeling. Ever.

 

“Life is really a great cosmic laughter.” – Osho

Listen, the joke is often on you, so why not laugh about it? It will more than likely be funny in a few years.

Why wait?

Laugh more now.

A-mazing Laughter, sculpture by Yue Minjun in Vancouver's English Bay

“A day without laughter is a day wasted.” – Charlie Chaplin

Life. IS. Funny.

Stop wasting your precious time worrying and stressing. Open yourself up to a big ol’ belly laugh.

Look for opportunities to laugh.

They’re everywhere when you pay attention.

 

 

Rise Up and Choose

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 6 Conversations

 

You have two options: 

1. The discomfort of taking action now

OR

2. The pain of your ‘someday’ thinking

 

Choose.

Anything else is avoidance.

Day 11 of Project 137

“Love what you want.” – Danielle LaPorte

 

You have everything you need to rise to the occasion.

For it is an occasion.

Dress up.

Open up.

Rise up,

and choose what you most want. 

Rise up and choose.

Come to the Dark Side: permission to own where you suck

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 50 Conversations

 

The past month has challenged me in all areas, mind, body and spirit.

I could blame it on Mercury retrograde, or my post conference funk, but whatever the reason, July took me out. You could say I’d been hit by a cosmic 2’x4′.

shadow image in black and white

Me and my shadow; welcome to the dark side.

Blocked and doubtful, Lizzie on full-blown loudspeaker about my work and what’s next, and then because that wasn’t enough, blindsided by an inflamed disc in my low back.

Really God? You thought that was a good idea?

And just like that, I fell down the slippery slope to the dark side.

The dark side ain’t pretty.

Continue reading →

Peace Comes From Within (and other thoughts on living)

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 25 Conversations

 

Peace comes from within mural, Vancouver, BC

I believe peace comes from within. Looking outside yourself is the booby prize; there’s no fulfillment there.

I believe it’s ok to slow down. Sometimes it’s the only thing that makes a difference.

I believe in connecting with like-minded souls. They nourish me in ways unexpected.

I believe inspiration can only take you so far. You’ve gotta dig deep to take the right actions that will make a difference.

I believe laughter is the best balm to our wounds. Lighten up, the world is funny and so are you.

I believe we’re all doing the best we can. And. . .we can be and do better than that when we stop, breathe and respond. Reaction is exhausting.

I believe we each have our own unique genius. Your only job in life is to deliver that; the rest is distraction.

I believe fear is a great motivator. If you’re not afraid, it’s probably not your thing so let it go.

I believe it’s good to share and express our humanity. We’ll never get it all handled, stop pretending and embrace real.

I believe in declaration. Say what you want, say what you’ll do and say it loud so others hear and hold you to it. This should scare the pants off you.

I believe in love. . .even when it’s hard, you’re afraid, and you want nothing more than to run away. What would love do now is the answer.

I believe in living life on my terms. It’s ok that you don’t agree, you’ve got your own terms to live, so live them.

I believe in doing what it takes. Your dreams are worth the effort, so just do the work please.

I believe you get to say. . .how you want your life to go and how you want to feel about that. Don’t squander it or give it away.

I believe it’s good to rest in the unknown. You may not like it, but it’s where ‘what’s next’ is born.

I’m there now, a midwife waiting for the birth.

 

Kiss Your Tolerations Goodbye

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 53 Conversations

 

You will make changes when the shit you’re currently tolerating becomes intolerable.

woman holding up left hand in STOP gesture

It’s that simple.

That’s what it takes to shift from tolerating and complaining about life to taking new actions. The pain of what you’re tolerating has to increase to such a degree you can’t take it anymore.

And that is a very good thing, or nothing would ever change.

But mostly we hate that it’s that simple. And we hate that it’s up to us to be responsible for our lives.

Instead, we come up with complicated reasons for dragging these tolerations around like an invisible ball and chain.

“I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do.” – Robert A. Heinlein

So I want you to make a list of all the shit you’re tolerating in your life.

Every single thing that’s not how you want it.

Here’s how this works:

visual of toleration exercise

As you can see, it’s not rocket science. But you do have to get straight about the real reasons you’re tolerating shit in your life.

The first reason is a get-out-of-jail-free card, and usually a socially acceptable reason. But it’s also bullshit because all it’s doing is letting you off the hook for being responsible for your own damn life!

The second reason is the truth.

Best case scenario, you’ll be free of the ball and chain, able to take a new action.

Bonus? You’ll restore your integrity instantly.

The alternative?

“Argue for your limitations and they’re yours.” – Richard Bach

 

Over to you:

  • Create your list and tell the truth about why you don’t have what you want.
  • For each toleration on your list declare a new action.