personal growth

Choose Your Path

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 16 Conversations

 

Do you view life as a maze, full of challenges and competition OR as a labyrinth, an opportunity to find yourself along the path?

A maze is designed to confuse you and test your ability to solve the challenge of getting to the centre.

A labyrinth is unicursal, designed with one single path that always leads to the centre.

labyrinth at Rivendell, Bowen Island

The Labyrinth at Rivendell

 

You are not born on one path or the other.

You get to choose your path.

Every single day.

Rational, logical, competitive, pressured ==> You’re in the maze.

Relaxed, present, connected to spirit ==> You’re walking the labyrinth.

Labyrinth thinking takes letting go of societal conditioning to get things done and win at all costs, ie: Who gets to the centre first? It takes letting go of traditional education’s conditioning to do it right and do as your told, ie: Follow the path exactly in order to get a gold star.

Notice your default view.

Maze or Labyrinth.

My work as a coach is not to tell you which path to choose.

It’s not about which path is right, but which path feels right for you.

shadow on Rivendell labyrinth, Bowen Island

If you’re alive you’re on the path.

Which would you rather walk?

 

Here I Am

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 21 Conversations

Reflections From A Retreat

Here I am, again.

Reacquainted with my Self.

Time slows down,

Here.

Rivendell labyrinth, Bowen Island

 Here, I am in need. . .

Of rest and connection.

It always seems easier,

Here.

Rivendell labyrinth, Bowen Island

Here I am, ready,

To let go of all plans.

To start anew,

Here.

centre of Rivendell labyrinth, Bowen Island

Here, I am centred.

I am always here,

But I’m only now,

Remembering.

Remembering.

Be A Waker

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 18 Conversations

 

“A waker is someone who is very good at waking other people up from their metaphorical slumber, temporary or otherwise.” – Hugh MacLeod

So, are you? A waker I mean.

I am.

I look back at my life and remember all the times I just had to rock the boat and wake people up.

Being a waker had me leave the 9-5 world and become a coach, a job that actually pays me to wake people up.

Life’s funny like that.

But being a waker isn’t necessarily an easy path in life.

As Hugh MacLeod says,

“A waker reminds you on a constant basis,  just how alive you really are….And there’s something about their influence that makes you utterly unable to go back to “sleep” ever again, in spite of your best efforts.”

Think about it. . .a lot of people don’t want to be woken up. Waking up takes courage and it’s so much easier to keep your head down and play it safe.

Sometimes. . .not often, but there are moments. . .I wish I could go back to those days of being less conscious, less awake.

But not really. Continue reading →

The Body Never Lies

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 21 Conversations

“Your body has a story to tell you. In order to take better care of your body, you have to find out about its needs. And the best way of discovering what will nourish and nurture you is to simply ask yourself.” – Cigdem Kobu

If you’ve never asked yourself this type of question, you might be surprised at how your body responds, how willing it is to communicate.

Your body has a story to tell. Your job is to listen.

Listening to your body is about letting its messages come through; messages you’ve ignored or avoided, messages overshadowed by the busyness of life.

Not listening has a significant cost to your well-being as I remember so well.

Continue reading →

Let Them Eat Cake

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 15 Conversations

 

If every behaviour has a positive intention, instead of flogging yourself and donning a hairshirt, why not look back and see a lifetime of you taking care of you?

Shaking your head in disbelief and doubt? I know, I hear it from clients all the time. I’m not going to lie, I even have to remind myself now and then.

But think about it like this for a moment. . .

You wouldn’t keep doing the things you do unless there was value for you in there somewhere. You just wouldn’t.

white cupcake with chocolate frosting

The stuff you do that feels good ==> positive intent.

ie: You buy organic because it’s healthier for you and better for the environment, which leads back to you feeling good.

The stuff you do that you suffer about ==> positive intent.

ie: You ate the stale cupcake because in that moment you felt sad about a friend that passed away recently, which lead to a need for comfort and the cupcake reminded you of your mom and how she used to bake treats for you as a kid (comfort), which leads back to you feeling good.

See? Positive. 

Whether it looks healthy and organic or iced and stale. . .all positive.

Are you getting this?

That’s why everything you do is self-care in some way.

Continue reading →

Mea Culpa, Mea Corpus

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 9 Conversations

 

Mea culpa.

I’m sorry it’s been so long since I’ve cared for you, cherished you the way you so deserve.

Mea corpus.

My body, strong, resilient, reliable. . .oh how I’ve neglected you.

It’s time for a heart to heart. To make amends.

 

Do you know you’re beautiful exactly the way you are?

No? That saddens me and yet I’m not surprised. It’s not something I’ve often said to you, is it.

Mea culpa mea corpus.

For I should have made sure you knew. I didn’t.

Instead, I focused on my mind, showering it with love and attention. You, got very little, and still you thrived, glowing with health for most of my life.

Have I thanked you?

No? That saddens me too for I pride myself on being mindful, appreciating the good in my life.

And you have been so very good.

Mea culpa.

I know you’re tired, and a bit worn out but I have finally heard your whisper. I am so grateful you have not given up.

The time has come and I’ve promised to give you my full attention.

My heart and devotion.

I have a lot to make up for, but I’m willing.

Mea culpa my beautiful body.

It’s time for a new beginning.

“We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.” – Maya Angelou

Over to you: 

  • Write a letter to your body.
  • Ask forgiveness for however it’s gone to date.
  • Then create and promise a new future.

 

This is an exercise from the 66 Day Self-Care Challenge. Take part in the challenge by commenting and using the #66days hashtag and connecting with me and C.A. Kobu on Twitter. Download the workbook  and leave a comment below. 

 

 

Lighten Up While You Still Can

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 7 Conversations

 

What if the 66 day challenge could be like this poem by Hafiz?

I used to live in a cramped house with confusion and pain.
But then I met the Friend and started getting drunk and singing all night.
Confusion and pain started acting nasty, making threats with talk like this;
If you don’t stop that – all that fun – we’re leaving. 

I’m not suggesting we all get drunk, but the idea behind it, the positive intent Hafiz suggests – that fun could make the difference to a challenge – IS appealing.

angel display Museum of International Folk Art Santa Fe New Mexico

What if these next 66 days could be fun, at least some of the time?

And what if you could lighten up just a little. . .or even a lot?

There’s no right way to do this thing.

The 66 day workbook is an awesome resource but it will make no difference if you feel dominated by it. I’m suggesting you use it in a way that works for you, because being rigid is never a good idea. Ever.

So, if the exercise portion seems too intense => chunk it down to what you CAN do, and do that a little each day.

And if you’re intimidated by the idea of meditating => start with 5 minutes daily for the first week.

This is YOUR self-care process and you get to say how it’s going to go, and what it’s going to include.

There’s no one-size-fits-all solution, no matter how good the solution.

The more willing you are to use the workbook and adapt it to your needs, the more likely you’ll see results.

Me? I’m going to crank some music and dance for 5 minutes!

Take it easy, take it easy 
Don’t let the sound of your own wheels 
Drive you crazy 
Lighten up while you still can 
Don’t even try to understand 
Just find a place to make your stand 
and take it easy 

– The Eagles

 

The End Is Always the Beginning

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 9 Conversations

two halves of broken egg shell

The idea for this homage to self-care came out of a conversation with Cadi Jordan and Tara Cieko over lunch some time in early September. There we were enjoying lunch, conversation and a little pampering, when we found ourselves wondering how we could take better care of ourselves in general.

The three of us are extremely capable business women, but we noticed we didn’t always look after our own well-being the way we look after others. Business, clients, family. . .all frequently took precedence. Sad, but true and not unique to us as this comes up often for many of my clients.

Of course that got my little grey cells working!

What would it take to commit to self-care for one month?

That’s the question that got me thinking. As a solution-focused coach I’m all about finding ways to move forward rather than focusing on the ‘right’ or perfect solution, and in my experience that often takes getting creative and getting support.

Years ago I did a year-long personal development program with a core belief that anything you want is available through community. And so I began by reaching out to my network of coaches and consultants with a passion for human potential.

And what an extraordinary group of people I’m blessed to know. I was reminded of the saying, “if you can make a dream happen on your own, your dream’s not big enough.”

Improving or honouring your self-care may not seem like a big dream to some, but when you’re struggling in this area of life, feeling more energized and taken care of is HUGE.

But where to start?

Continue reading →

25 Breaks to Energize You

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 36 Conversations

 

It’s easy to feel overwhelmed, stressed and drained in your day-to-day life isn’t it?

Inundated by email, voicemail and texts for starters, there’s an unspoken assumption that you should be available 24/7. And that’s before taking into account your kids, spouse or partner!

24/7 . . .

Do you really want to be that available?

I felt my energy drain just writing that!

The truth is everything in life is either giving you energy or draining it. The best way to combat the energy drain is to be at your most resourceful by building up and replenishing your energy throughout the day.

This is an opportunity to get creative and proactive about your self-care – a very good thing to take on during this month-long Homage to Self-Care

With a little attention, you can integrate these breaks into your life and with practice, develop new habits that top up your energy leaving you feeling better than ever.

Continue reading →

The System of You: Mind, Body & Spirit

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 21 Conversations

You are a system that consists of mind, body and soul.

You are a system that consists of mind, body and spirit.

three figures in reflection In this trinity, you probably have a preference, an area that comes effortlessly and alongside that, an area of challenge.

For me, the focus on the mind is taken care of with almost no thought as I read constantly, love learning and sharing what I’ve learned with others.

My spirit is cared for, although a bit less reliably, but I do make time to meditate, unplug and attend silent retreats as often as I can.

The system is challenged most in the physical, my body, and over time, this has taken a toll.

As I shared in the introduction to this month-long Homage, what works for me is to take things on in community with an aspect of accountability.

Well then, what better place to be held accountable than right here on my blog?!

Because here’s the thing…

Your body doesn’t lie.

This comes up a lot in my coaching work with clients.

Mostly because we don’t generally pay enough attention to what’s going on in our bodies and there’s a cost to that. A cost to our well-being and energy, but also to our emotional resourcefulness.

But instead of listening to our bodies, we ignore, rationalize and suppress most of the messages our bodies are giving us every day.

What do you think might show up if you really started paying attention, listening to those messages?

What positive impact would it have to check in with yourself throughout the day asking,

“What message is my body giving me right now?”

For example:

  • Your back twinges.
    • Do you move away from your desk, stretch and/or make yourself a cup of tea?
    • Or do you push through the twinge and keep working for another hour?
  • Your neck feels tense.
    • Do you drop your chin, close your eyes and roll your neck from left to right feeling the tension release?
    • Or do you give your shoulders a quick shrug and quickly get back to work?
  • Your belly growls.
    • Do you jump up to grab a snack?
    • Or do you check in, listening for what it needs. Food? Water? Distraction?
“No more words. Hear only the voice within.” – Rumi

Your body is constantly talking to you; are you listening?

Continue reading →