personal development

Her Name Was Lola

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 66 Conversations

 

The time has come to unleash that part of yourself you’ve been holding back.

You know, that part of you that likes the spotlight, craves attention and is longing to shine like the gems on a showgirl’s. . .tiara!

YES! That part!

Let’s call this oh-so-sparkly part Lola!

Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl
With yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to there

You might be thinking, “Hold on there! That’s crazy!”, what does Lola have to do with my life and business?

Everything!

And yes, I know Lola loses her mind at the end of the song, but let’s focus on the positive for now, ok?

So. . .what exactly is so appealing about Lola?

Two words – showgirl strut!

It’s a way of being that is unabashedly, unapologetically, out-there-in-the-limelight, shining like you really want to!

It’s a way of being that has you shine from the inside out, sharing yourself and your gifts in the way that would be most wildly fulfilling for you.

Look at this gorgeous showgirl in the photo!

For me, she’s the epitome of Lola, oozing confidence, radiance and presence. And her smile beams like a beacon!

That’s what I’m talking about, and if it takes feathers and high heels to get into character? Then so be it!

Mars Dorian said it this way, “If you want to have an exciting and incredible life, you must make your favourite personality traits 3 times more extreme.”

When I first read his post it reminded me of a leadership training I did many years ago. One assignment that we had to do for the duration of the 6 month program was to be 10 times more excited in life.

Can you imagine?!

I thought this would be a piece of cake! I mean really, I’m outgoing, an obvious extrovert and I’m usually pretty excited (and excitable) in life.

However, much to my surprise the assignment uncovered all the areas where I wasn’t fully myself, where I hid my light, suppressed what I wanted and played small. There were no sparkles and definitely no feather boas in sight!

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Playing the Game of Love

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 9 Conversations

What’s this talk of a game?

Call me crazy, but I think love is a game.

And like all games, how you play makes all the difference.

Before we get into the “rules”, let me share a bit of my story and what changed my thoughts on love.

You see, my heart was broken once, long ago.

So very broken.

It felt irreparable and I believed that life would never be the same.

And it wouldn’t be the same. Ever.

How could it be?

No matter how hard you try to repair something, it can never be what it once was.

That’s not to say it can’t be better, but I never thought of it that way all those years ago.

I simply felt damaged. Broken beyond repair.

Jasmine Lamb says, “Most of us long for love, look out for love, worry we are too late for love, but not enough of us live love.”

Jasmine is so very right.

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Nothing But the Facts

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 18 Conversations

 

Coaching – 57,800,000 results according to Google.

Welcome to the world of coaching in 2011.

Ten years ago? I’d get the blank stare, followed by a hesitant, “What sport do you coach?”

Now? Coaches are everywhere. The Internet is full of them. It’s the newest, most all encompassing trend there is and if you spend any amount of time online you’ll discover quickly that every Tom, Dick and Harry is now calling themselves a a coach.

But what exactly does that mean?

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How 2 Small Words Will Snap You Out of a Funk

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 9 Conversations

Two small words that have the power to create reality.

It can be a reality that feels good, full of possibility. Or the opposite, a full on funk that has you on the couch with the remote in one hand and a bag of chips in the other.

But wait!

What if you could…

  • write that book
  • skydive
  • learn a new language
  • start a business
  • have the body, career, mate, life you’ve been dreaming of?

I’m guessing those goals, or similar ones, can easily trigger your lizard brain and I can already hear the “yeah buts” that want to keep you in the funk!

What if you…

  • aren’t creative enough
  • are too afraid
  • aren’t good with languages
  • don’t have the funding…or the courage
  • aren’t willing to do what it takes?

Familiar? I know, and not in a good way.

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Everything is practice

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 17 Conversations

 

Sometimes I am blinded by the light.

My light.

Sometimes I go to a dark and scary neighbourhood.

In my head.

It’s bleak in there.

I do my best not to visit very often, but sometimes?

The pull is magnetic.

It’s a slippery slope once I’m there, but over the years I’ve discovered a few ways to pull myself out of the dark and off the slope.

 

How to Resist the Pull

1.  Unplug

I step away. From my laptop and phones. I turn off all the ringers, bells and whistles. Simple? Yes. Easy to do? Not so much.

But here’s the thing – it works every time.

“Every step you take is a step away from where you used to be.” – Brian Chargualaf

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How to Grow Yourself Up in 5 (not-so-easy) Lessons

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 44 Conversations

 

“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” – e.e. cummings

Almost 11 years ago I found myself sitting on a plane en route to Amsterdam, wondering “How did I get here?”  It was a surreal moment, and it all began with a question (by now, surely you know that I’m all about asking questions!).

I was at a weekend workshop (an amazing program called Wisdom Unlimited), confronted by life and my inability to decide what I wanted to be when I grew up! I was doing an exercise, beating around the bush, not quite answering when the person I was working with blurted out in frustration, “Sandi, what the hell do you want? Just say it!”

In that moment I responded without thinking, “I want to be a photographer and travel, and get paid for that.”

I said it quickly, mumbling under my breath, but I said the words out loud for the very first time. A new dream, spoken into existence.

Fast forward six months, and there I was on the plane heading to the Netherlands to apprentice with a professional photographer in his studio.

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We Are All Meant to Shine

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 29 Conversations

 

Ever notice how quickly you can shift from feeling inspired to feeling attached?

A sudden, intense drive to make things happen a particular way takes over and inspiration is nowhere to be found; gone like the breath you took 10 seconds ago.

You fixate on a goal and suffer when it’s taking longer than you wanted or expected.

Pretty funny if you can get back to the realization that you made it all up to begin with!

Maybe you. . .

  • Obsess about your progress until you give yourself a headache
  • Try forcing the outcome thereby pissing off everyone involved
  • Refuse to quit, even though everything in you is saying “let it go”
  • Exhibit a dog-with-a-bone-like determination. Grrrrr, get out of my way!

So what’s a results oriented, bottom-line human doing supposed to do when it’s not about the doing? Continue reading →

10 Tips for Getting the Most Out of Coaching (and Life)

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 33 Conversations

 

When I began coaching almost 10 years ago, it was common for people to ask, “What sport?”

These days more people know about coaching but here’s what I’ve been hearing in conversations – they don’t necessarily know how to use it or apply it to what they’re up to in life.

It’s like when you buy a gadget (I’m sure I’m not the only one with a drawer full of kitchen gagdets, right?)

You think it’s awesome and you impulsively buy it. You get the awesome thing home and then…you forget about it. By the time you do pick it up again, you have completely forgotten what it’s for or how to use it.

Coaching is a bit like that. I’ve had clients hire me all excited to begin pursuing a dream, only to change their mind, succumb to their doubts and fears (hello lizard brain) and forget all about it.

Just like that gagdet in the drawer.

You didn’t really want to write that book, run that marathon, build that business did you?

YES, you did. And I think you still do so let’s pull your dream out of that drawer, shall we?

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If I Could Say Anything

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 85 Conversations

 

We need to talk.

If we were dating, it’d be time to fess up (I’m on a roll, this is my second confession this week) and that scares me.

Since we started seeing each other four months ago (has it really only been 4 months?) I’ve been wanting to make a good impression, wanting to show you my best.

Except…

What I thought was my best was not.

Likable, nice, funny, smart – check.

My best? Not so much.

I’m saying this because I’ve had moments of:

  • biting my tongue
  • suppressing myself
  • ignoring my instincts
  • sweeping a thought under the rug

I have stopped myself in so many ways from saying what I wanted to say. But enough is enough; this can’t go on.

If I could say anything, I’d say what I wanted to say, straight up.

I’ve been afraid.

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The ABC’s of Back-to-School

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 13 Conversations

 

I have always loved back-to-school energy. I was a keener when I was young and loved everything about this time of year: new clothes, new teachers and yes, new school supplies!

The energy of starting fresh was a high, and I couldn’t wait to get back and get going.

I’m an adult now, and guess what? Not much has changed!

What if we had access to that kind of energy more consistently in life?

What if that energy could fuel our dreams?

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