lizard brain

Experiment in Trust

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 23 Conversations

 

Trust has been on my mind a lot lately.

You might think after so many years of personal development and almost a decade of coaching I’d be a very trusting person.

Not so much.

My lil’ lizard brain is suspicious and cynical, and you’d be amazed at the skepticism that rears its head almost every time I read or try something new. Why do you think it took me so long to start a blog and get on Twitter?

I’ve been lied to and cheated on in the game of love.

I’ve been burned by business agreements gone wrong, promises broken.

I’ve been hard done by, strung along and…

I know. This is starting to sound like a dramatic, movie-of-the-week. The result is this,

Not. So. Trusting.

You’ve got your own story of disillusionment and disappointment, so, we’re in this together.

Continue reading →

How 2 Small Words Will Snap You Out of a Funk

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 9 Conversations

Two small words that have the power to create reality.

It can be a reality that feels good, full of possibility. Or the opposite, a full on funk that has you on the couch with the remote in one hand and a bag of chips in the other.

But wait!

What if you could…

  • write that book
  • skydive
  • learn a new language
  • start a business
  • have the body, career, mate, life you’ve been dreaming of?

I’m guessing those goals, or similar ones, can easily trigger your lizard brain and I can already hear the “yeah buts” that want to keep you in the funk!

What if you…

  • aren’t creative enough
  • are too afraid
  • aren’t good with languages
  • don’t have the funding…or the courage
  • aren’t willing to do what it takes?

Familiar? I know, and not in a good way.

Continue reading →

How to Grow Yourself Up in 5 (not-so-easy) Lessons

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 44 Conversations

 

“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” – e.e. cummings

Almost 11 years ago I found myself sitting on a plane en route to Amsterdam, wondering “How did I get here?”  It was a surreal moment, and it all began with a question (by now, surely you know that I’m all about asking questions!).

I was at a weekend workshop (an amazing program called Wisdom Unlimited), confronted by life and my inability to decide what I wanted to be when I grew up! I was doing an exercise, beating around the bush, not quite answering when the person I was working with blurted out in frustration, “Sandi, what the hell do you want? Just say it!”

In that moment I responded without thinking, “I want to be a photographer and travel, and get paid for that.”

I said it quickly, mumbling under my breath, but I said the words out loud for the very first time. A new dream, spoken into existence.

Fast forward six months, and there I was on the plane heading to the Netherlands to apprentice with a professional photographer in his studio.

Continue reading →

10 Tips for Getting the Most Out of Coaching (and Life)

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 33 Conversations

 

When I began coaching almost 10 years ago, it was common for people to ask, “What sport?”

These days more people know about coaching but here’s what I’ve been hearing in conversations – they don’t necessarily know how to use it or apply it to what they’re up to in life.

It’s like when you buy a gadget (I’m sure I’m not the only one with a drawer full of kitchen gagdets, right?)

You think it’s awesome and you impulsively buy it. You get the awesome thing home and then…you forget about it. By the time you do pick it up again, you have completely forgotten what it’s for or how to use it.

Coaching is a bit like that. I’ve had clients hire me all excited to begin pursuing a dream, only to change their mind, succumb to their doubts and fears (hello lizard brain) and forget all about it.

Just like that gagdet in the drawer.

You didn’t really want to write that book, run that marathon, build that business did you?

YES, you did. And I think you still do so let’s pull your dream out of that drawer, shall we?

Continue reading →

If I Could Say Anything

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 85 Conversations

 

We need to talk.

If we were dating, it’d be time to fess up (I’m on a roll, this is my second confession this week) and that scares me.

Since we started seeing each other four months ago (has it really only been 4 months?) I’ve been wanting to make a good impression, wanting to show you my best.

Except…

What I thought was my best was not.

Likable, nice, funny, smart – check.

My best? Not so much.

I’m saying this because I’ve had moments of:

  • biting my tongue
  • suppressing myself
  • ignoring my instincts
  • sweeping a thought under the rug

I have stopped myself in so many ways from saying what I wanted to say. But enough is enough; this can’t go on.

If I could say anything, I’d say what I wanted to say, straight up.

I’ve been afraid.

Continue reading →

The ABC’s of Back-to-School

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 13 Conversations

 

I have always loved back-to-school energy. I was a keener when I was young and loved everything about this time of year: new clothes, new teachers and yes, new school supplies!

The energy of starting fresh was a high, and I couldn’t wait to get back and get going.

I’m an adult now, and guess what? Not much has changed!

What if we had access to that kind of energy more consistently in life?

What if that energy could fuel our dreams?

Continue reading →

Fuck the Lizard Brain

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 89 Conversations

My lizard brain is saying:

Don’t do it! Don’t blow your momentum. . .

  • with a silly post
  • by swearing
  • lots of other crazy, lizardy chatter

Fuck the lizard brain.

Since launching this blog life has been intense. Taking on the 31 Day Build a Better Blog challenge added fuel to the fire already burning and it was getting HOT!

So my guy and I packed a picnic dinner and headed down to the beach with our books. Continue reading →

5 Steps to Managing Your Lizard Brain

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 33 Conversations

No matter how much personal development work you’ve done, no matter how many self-help books you’ve read, there’s one thing you need to know…

Salamander: photo credit - Mark Faviell

This little fella ain’t never going away!

 

Your lizard brain is never going away and it’s never going to shut up.

It’s there for your survival and we’re still here as a species so it must be doing something right. Thing is, survival isn’t what it used to be.

Our Neanderthal ancestors? They had to deal with survival; saber tooth tigers and warring tribes were a real threat! That you’re afraid to try something new and step out of your comfort zone – not so much.

So if it’s never going away and never shutting up, just how do you manage this ancient, survival driven part of your brain?

1. Talk to it

“There is only one cause of unhappiness: the false beliefs you have in your head, beliefs so widespread, so commonly held, that it never occurs to you to question them.” – Anthony de Mello

Start questioning it! One of the best ways I’ve found to talk to the lizard brain is through The Work, a process created by Byron Katie. It’s a process of identifying and questioning the thoughts that cause all the fear that trigger your lizard brain.

Continue reading →

Living in the Questions

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 33 Conversations

 

When I started blogging I declared somewhat boldly that I had come up with a theme, a road map of where I was headed. It was all well and good to begin just to begin (thanks to guru Seth and his call to action), but I’d begun questioning my Why.

Why do it? Why put myself out there? Why take the risk?

As the doubts began to creep in, I decided to return to my tribe – who I love and trust much more than my lizard brain – and what they told me was this:

I’m relentlessly curious, a life-long learner and I’ve got more questions up my sleeve than Houdini!

It’s so damn easy to forget who I really am when LB starts whispering in my ear.

It blows my mind that somehow I stumbled upon the profession of coaching and had the biggest insight of my life:  this is what I’m supposed to be when I grow up!

What a relief to finally know and begin using my strengths rather than wondering why I had them! Up until then no J.O.B. had fit the bill and I constantly felt like a round peg in a square hole.

It’s been said when you know your Why, anything is possible.

My Why was so big (honouring my values of growth, learning and contribution) and so loud that it drowned out my lizard brain long enough that I could take the first steps, and then the next.

It took something to keep my word, writing and posting – shipping – every week. I began by really getting into the questions. I jotted down questions that worked with clients; questions I overheard; questions we usually don’t have the courage to ask ourselves.

Then I read How to Think Like Leonardo da Vinci. In this very cool, yet practical guide Michael Gelb invites us to begin training our vast untapped resources to start thinking like Leonardo.

Is it really possible to think like a Renaissance genius?

Continue reading →

How the 80/20 Rule Can Inspire You

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 16 Conversations

 

I’ve spent the past couple of months in the Life Lab (doesn’t life occur as an experiment a lot of the time?).  I’ve been re-examining all aspects of my life and business, noticing my reactions, managing my emotions and asking myself a lot of questions.

It’s all about the questions (more on that later).

Do you know the 80/20 rule?

In the 19th century, an Italian economist and sociologist, Vilfredo Pareto, noticed that 80% of the wealth in Italy was held by 20% of the population.  He then went on to demonstrate this to be true in other countries as well.  Since Pareto’s time, this rule has been found to be true in virtually any area:

  • 20% of the streets handle 80% of the traffic
  • 20% of the features in a product are used 80% of the time
  • 20% of sales people bring in 80% of the sales
  • 80% of our time is spent on 20% of the problems

The only way to really see the 80/20 rule is to step back and look at the bigger picture, the larger perspective.  When you first do this it’s mind blowing; there’s nothing quite like seeing things clearly.  Seeing the forest rather than the trees!

If you don’t know what the big picture is, how can you make decisions that will lead you to your desired outcome?

Continue reading →