lizard brain

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 22 Conversations

 

When you look in the mirror what do you see?

Some days it’s not easy.

You look at your reflection in the mirror and feel an onslaught of thoughts, many of them negative as the lizard brain sings its song of seduction.

Maybe you barely look, glancing just long enough to comb your hair, brush your teeth or apply make-up.

Or maybe you use one of those scary magnifying mirrors so that all you can see are your parts.

eyes. . .brows. . .nose. . .ears. . .lips. . .teeth. . .skin. . . limbs

“If you are irritated by every rub, how will your mirror be polished?” – Rumi

And you are irritated by those parts; the ones you judge and assess, or compare against others.

 

Do you ever really see YOU?

Some days it’s not easy.

I know. I get it. But I have a different view.

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The Death of Someday

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 37 Conversations


Day 28 – Vocabulary

If you could eliminate one word from your brain forever—what would it be?

If you’ve read anything I’ve written the past year or even just my online bio, you’ll know that the word I’d eliminate is someday.

some·day

– at some unspecified time in the (distant) future

How I detest that word.

It lets you off the hook, not responsible for your life and makes me cringe with distaste. It calls to mind a funeral I attended a few years ago.

I saw people cry, full of regrets for what might have been with the deceased. I heard people make promises of how it would be different, maybe not right then and there, but someday.

Those promises? Soon forgotten.

St. Boniface cemetery, Winnipeg, Manitoba

I’m not immune to someday.

Everyone falls prey to it sometimes and I’ve had my periods of inaction and stuckness. I’ve also kicked my someday thinking to the curb on many occasions:

  • Someday I’ll be more athletic. ==> I ran a half marathon at 34, one year after knee surgery.
  • Someday I’ll figure out what I want to be when I grow up. ==>I found my calling as a coach at 37, and a new calling as a writer at 47.
  • Someday I’ll write a book, even though I’m still not sure of the topic. ==> 2012 is the year this will happen.

Someday is a dream killer.

It will kill your dreams in a heartbeat if you let it. These 3 tips can help you avoid that regretful outcome!

 

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Yesterday You Said Tomorrow

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 41 Conversations

 

Tomorrow you’re going to take that trip; you know, the one you’ve always dreamed of.

Tomorrow you’re going to write that book; you know, the one that’s been burning inside you forever.

Tomorrow is going to be the day you have fun; no really, the whole day just to play like a child.

But the days turn into weeks, and then into months.

The tomorrows add up and turn into years.

And you look back and wonder. . .

What the hell happened? 

They say time flies when you’re having fun.

Ha! It also flies when you’re saving up your tomorrows.

But. . .

What if today you did something different?

What if today you took one new action?

Because here’s the thing. . .

You’ve said tomorrow far too often and far too long.

You know it’s true.

It’s time to start saying (and doing) something new.

NOW.

Like shifting from someday thinking to ==> “Hell yeah, what one action can I take today?”

Like hearing your lizard brain and saying ==> “Screw you Lizzy! I’m gonna make that call!”

Like listening to your heart’s desire and saying ==> “YES, I hear you now.”

Others have done it.

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Plugged into Silence

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 26 Conversations

 

The plan was to take a few days off, meander through rural Washington and spend some time with my husband Mark.

Masters of the road trip, we often leave town for 3-4 days with his camera and my laptop in hand.

Time together pursuing our passions. His passion for the seaside towns of the Pacific Northwest often get him out of bed early, while I settle in with a cup of coffee and my laptop. Usually, I organize or find Internet access so that I can check in. Not quite unplugged, but the volume turned down considerably.

This time however, I unplugged completely.

We wandered, relaxed, took photos, read books and enjoyed each other’s company.

Silence crept in, at first like an uninvited guest.

two buddha heads side by side

But I soon found myself appreciating it, my mind no longer wondering what was happening elsewhere. I know from past experiences with silent retreats that I am nourished by silence, but in the busyness of life I forget.

Be here now.

Easier said than done sometimes.

Most times.

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Disarming the Critic

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 1 Conversation

 

The Vagabondage Series:  Elana Baxter on lizard busting.

 

I recently became aware of just how much and how often my inner critic pipes up to tell me how badly I am doing things. How much better, more productive, kinder, and more __________I need to be.

black and white image of hand holding cup with word critic on it

And when the critic isn’t telling me that, it’s attacking my body, eating habits, parenting, cooking and cleaning.

Be more!

Do more!

It’s a constant rant punctuated only briefly by sneaks of quiet.

I have come to the only sane conclusion that a woman experiencing this incessant haranguing can. . .

The inner critic must die or at the very least it must be sedated. Heavily.

I am tired of beating the shit out of myself. Every ounce of energy spent hating on myself, nitpicking, correcting, disallowing and crapping down my own throat!

I can’t get that energy back. And I can’t get the time back.

It’s gone. Forever.

Here’s what I do in order to allow some space and begin showing myself some love and compassion.

I disarm the voice.

You know the voice, right?

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Sticky Stories and the Lizard That Stops Us

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 6 Conversations

 

The Vagabondage Series:  Elana Baxter on escaping the comfort zone.

 

We all have weaknesses and not just one or two.

Some of mine include English period films, glossy magazines, gossip sites and espresso. But there’s one weakness I’ve yet to divulge until today.

Worksheets.

I know, a bit anticlimactic and not even a bit risqué. But nevertheless, I have a soft spot for worksheets.

So when my coach told me she would be sending some along – not one, but some – I was ready to dive in and start neatly answering all of the questions, eager to ponder each one with focused consideration.

Then they came.

After the initial introduction discussing my favourite subjects – ideal work and living a life you love – I hurried to the next section to begin. That’s when the can of worms began to squirm uncomfortably.

List what you dreamed of as a child seemed a simple enough statement. I could do that. Plus, I’d been instructed to slap a roll of duct tape on the lizard brain in order to do the work and just write whatever felt right and true. I resolved to quietly ignore the squirming worms and move on.

Visions and memories of dancing, singing, writing, drawing, painting, playing music – they all came to the surface. I looked at my answers. All silent contemplation went up in flames. The worms started a full-fledged riot, apparently not happy in their can and my lizard brain had removed the duct tape muzzle (lizards are tricky little bastards).

I can’t dance now! I’m too old.

Singing? There’s no time for s i n g i n g!

Painting?!! Now you’re really talking a fine tune right out of your ass lady!

And so on.

Every joyous memory and hopeful vision, dismantled by the lizard and a chorus of obnoxious worms with a story to tell.

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Quieting the Voices

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 11 Conversations

 

The Vagabondage Series:  Wherein Elana Baxter slams the door on her own personal kryptonite!

 

Over the last week, I’ve been engaged in a form of mental hand to hand combat.

With whom you might be asking. . .

Some of the sneakiest, most crippling villains shadowing the psyches of folks everywhere as we do our best to show up, don our superhero capes and fly out into the open air to rally for a sweet, satisfaction-filled life.

Bert and Ernie dolls

You and I know them well. They are the kryptonite of action, the Achilles heel of focused intention, and the chocolate espresso cheesecake slyly beckoning from a pastry case after a long, tough day.

Allow me to introduce my UnFab Five, a.k.a. the saboteurs of

  • overwhelm
  • judgement
  • perfectionism
  • impatience
  • lack of integrity

I’ve met each of these bad boys and we know each other intimately. Recently, I had the chance to chat with all of them and here for your viewing pleasure are the outtakes:

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What the Heck Is the Point?

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 43 Conversations

 

Why do you do what you do?

Love.

Money.

Purpose?

What compels you to take action when you’re paralyzed with fear?

When the lizard rears up in its loud, persistent glory?

It’s said that if you have a big enough why, anything is possible.

People like Martin Luther King Jr., Mother Theresa, and Gandhi (the usual suspects) all started with “why.”

It was their why that enabled them to do what they did, inspiring others and achieving remarkable things.

It might sound blasphemous, but I don’t think of them as extraordinary human beings.

They were just like you and me. Ordinary people with one major difference.

They had a very BIG why.

What’s yours?

And is it big enough?

[pullquote]“That which is within you and expressed will set you free, but that which is within you and not expressed will eat you from inside.” – Book of Thomas[/pullquote]

Your why is yearning to be expressed.

Why do you do what you do?

Without a clear answer to this question. . .

What the heck is the point?

 

 

Relentless Got Me Here

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 22 Conversations

 

re·lent·less

– showing or promising no abatement of severity, intensity, strength, or pace

Synonyms: determined, dogged, grim, implacable, unyielding, unflinching, unrepenting

Damn! Doesn’t sound very appealing does it?

But being relentless about something you want with your whole heart and soul?

Hell yeah, sign me up!

That’s what I’m talking about.

Being a force to be reckoned with, a dog-with-a-bone for something that burns from inside, keeping you up at night.

I have been called relentless.

Ugh. At first it made me cringe.

It triggered that primal “Will they like me? or Will they kick me out of the tribe?” fear.

But…then I got to thinking…and realized this relentless part of me has generated a lot of satisfaction and joy in my life.

This dogged-unflinching-unrelenting part has got me here, to my 100th blog post.

That may not sound like a big deal, but here’s the thing…

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Starbursts, Sirens and Siriously Shining

Posted on by Sandi Amorim 63 Conversations

 

Fear doesn’t stop you. YOU stop you.

 

I’ve wanted to write this post since my father-in-law’s sudden death, but the wanting was tinged with fear.

Fear that you would be put off, not get my point or worse, ignore me all together.

I’ve been headed in this direction for some time, but I’ve allowed fear to slow my steps.

Then death jolted me out of my comfort zone.

“You don’t get to choose how you’re going to die. Or when. You can only decide how you’re going to live. Now.” – Joan Baez

So it’s time to call bullshit…

You live like there’s someday.

You live like you have all the time in the world to pursue your dreams and follow your passions.

Plenty of time to shine… later.

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