Dear One,
Stop your searching.
The light you long for
will be found
within.
xoS
Coaching
If Happiness Is A Choice
A happy moment.
Drinking my rooibos tea and looking around as I work at a nearby cafe.
I feel satisfied to be doing work I love, and grateful that I can do it from almost anywhere in the world.
Like a cat in the sun, I am absorbing the energy of the people around me.
It’s satisfying and I feel happy.
And then I have this thought. . .
If happiness is a choice, why don’t we always choose it?
Is it a myth that happiness is a choice?
If it were true, wouldn’t more people be happy?
In her new book The Myths of Happiness Sonja Lyubomirsky suggests that we’ve been given false promises when it comes to happiness. Myths that set us up for disappointment due to their external nature.
You’re familiar with the “I’ll be happy when…” syndrome, aren’t you?
No one’s immune to it, as far as I can tell.
“It turns out that the key to happiness and health… is not how intensely happy we feel, but how often we feel positive or happy.” – Sonja Lyubomirsky
Having read Lyubomirsky’s earlier book The How of Happiness, I know she doesn’t overwhelm with scientific fact, instead delivering a very human element in her writing.
So I’m on the case, inquiring into happiness as I begin reading The Myths of Happiness – a review will be posted February 7, 2013.
For now, I want to hear what you think.
Over to you:
- Is happiness really a choice?
- If so, what helps you choose it more consistently in your life?
Weep and Set Yourself Free
What is it you want to change?
Your hair, your face, your body?
Why?
For God is in love with all those things
and he might weep when they are gone.
~ St. Catherine of Sienna
Weep…
for what you’ve judged
and made so very wrong.
Weep…
for all that you’ve lost,
that can never be regained.
Weep…
let go, and
release what’s been held.
Allow what is,
and accept what is not.
Weep…
forgive,
and set yourself free.
I Dream, Therefore I Am
It’s time to dream. . .
It’s time to dream.
“I have a dream…” – Martin Luther King Jr.
1. “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do… Explore. Dream. Discover.” – H. Jackson Brown Jr.
- This quote screams of regrets and someday thinking. Take a chance, swing out and be honest about what you want.
2. “Dreams are THE BEST! The DayDreams, the Secret Wishes, THOSE Dreams we keep and cherish, hidden in the spaces between our heartbeats.” – Bif Naked
3. “It’s the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting.” – Paulo Coelho
- It’s the possibility, anticipation and taking action on the dream that provides a fulfilling experience, sometimes more than having the dream itself materialize. When your values are guiding you, satisfaction is pretty much guaranteed.
4. “You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” – C.S. Lewis
- I’ve been working on my 50 For 50 list, things I’m going to do during my 50th year. It’s inspiring and kind of awesome to inspire yourself in this way, especially when you start early and have a breakthrough like I did recently!
5. “A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality.” – John Lennon
- Dream with others, get supported and create a new reality.
What It Takes to Nourish the Soul
“Amidst life’s busyness, we need ways to slow down, turn our attention within, and reconnect with ourselves.” – Karen Horneffer-Ginter
Self-care, for almost everyone I’ve worked with in over a decade, is an ongoing challenge. For the purpose of this post I use the term self-care to refer to the care of mind, body and spirit.
For many, the challenge is obvious, showing up in the physical: do they get enough sleep, does their diet nourish them, etc.
For others, the majority it often seems, the challenge reveals itself in the emotional or spiritual realms, which is not as easily seen or remedied.
Full Cup, Thirsty Spirit is a book that speaks directly to this challenge.
Written by Karen Horneffer-Ginter, it touches on the most personal and challenging aspects of self-care in a world that often has us running like a hamster on a wheel.
“We live in a world of constant movement, and our day-to-day lives seem to get busier by the hour. Our days are full of information, full of obligations, full of friends and family, full of everything…except fulfillment.”
This statement is true for far too many people. The busyness and stressors of daily life can easily become overwhelming, and self-care is usually the first thing to go when faced with a time or energy crunch.
So, how do you deal with this challenge?
A Rampage of Appreciation
Every time you appreciate something,
every time you praise something,
every time you feel good about something,
you are telling the Universe,
“More of this, please.”
– Abraham-Hicks
I’ve just had a brilliant day.
Not just because the sun was shining here in Vancouver (a rare occurrence in January!)
It was simply one of those days, awake and present to my life.
And it reminded me of an amazing practice called rampage of appreciation, from Abraham-Hicks.
So good for what ails you, and more than a little woowoo.
Here’s how it works:
- Make a list of everything you appreciate right now.
- Keep going.
- Continue.
- Add to your list.
- That’s it, you’re doing great.
- How about a couple more?
That’s it. Crazy simple, yeah?
Six Impossible Things
“Alice laughed. ‘There’s no use trying,’ she said. ‘One can’t believe impossible things.’
‘I daresay you haven’t had much practice,’ said the Queen. ‘When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.” – Lewis Carroll
You believe all kinds of crap about yourself.
Stories you made up as a child, that are still with you to this day.
“Made up” are the words I want you to focus on right now.
You made it all up.
And then, you turned those made up tales into rock solid truths about who you are.
Now here’s the amazing part. . .
You Are Beyond Compare
Dear One,
As the new year begins, it seems you need a reminder of how truly awesome you are.
Maybe you got caught up in the new year’s hype, and fell prey to comparisonitis.
But you (and you’ve really got to get this) are beyond comparison.
Your heart and courage inspire, and not a day goes by that someone isn’t touched by you.
Listen. . .
and hear the truth of these words.
You are beyond compare.
You care about people, and share yourself generously, and when you love you do so wholeheartedly. It is truly a masterful part of your being.
And people respond.
Yes, they always do and tell you so often. So much love coming to you every day, and sometimes you don’t notice it at all.
I’m writing these words to remind you.
You are awesome and you are loved.
xo
Meditate Right Now
We know that meditation is good for us.
- On a physical level, meditation can reduce your blood pressure, boost your immune system, diminish chronic pain, and that’s just for starts.
- Emotionally, meditation brings greater calm, a feeling of spaciousness and a sense of humor about the vagaries of life.
- Spiritually, meditation is the path to become truly human: loving, patient, understanding, forgiving, clear yet relaxed and playful.
Yet, we resist. We moan and groan, “There’s not enough time.”
We keep putting meditation off until tomorrow, next week, next month. Until illness or death arrives and we’re twisted by fear, wracked with regret.
How can we die peacefully if we haven’t tasted peace of mind in life?
There’s one simple and immediate solution to the problem of no time: Meditate Right Now.
You Can Meditate Right Now
You don’t need elaborate preparations, the right space, incense, or even a meditation cushion.
An Ode to the Heart
For most of my life, I’ve paid far more attention to my head than my heart. I’ve heard enough stories to know I’m not alone in this.
It’s puzzling really, for my head, on its endless quest for logic and knowledge, has all too often led me astray.
It’s been distracted, and even dazzled by facts, figures, reasons; all requirements in the heady world.
My heart however, has been treated like Cinderella – ignored, occasionally mocked, and left behind to tend to itself.
It took my heart being broken (but not really) to change this sad state of affairs.
It took getting quiet enough to hear it.
For the truth is, I didn’t know until then that I wasn’t hearing it (picture an ignorance is bliss scenario.)
My heart has taught me to be grateful for those years of sadness.
They helped me grow, and got me in touch with what was really important in my life.
Seems my heart knew all along what that was.
My heart has worked hard on my behalf for little recognition, until today. Until I asked the following question. . .