Do You Know What’s Important?

 

This post comes to you from a rather unusual location;  I wrote it sitting at a pub surrounded by men, beer and a good deal of testosterone.

World Cup fever grabbed hold of my husband and on Friday he asked if I would please spend a part of our day off together in front of a big screen watching the England vs. Algeria match.

As the game got under way, and I glanced around the pub, this question came to mind:

What’s important?

Many of the fans wore the bright red of the English team.  My husband Mark, suddenly overcome by a desire to show his support, impulsively bought himself a jersey, instantly branding himself a member of the English tribe.

Fanatic – a person with an extreme and uncritical enthusiasm or zeal, as in religion or politics

The servers even wore specially made T-shirts that read,“It’s not soccer, it’s football, you wanker!”

To those fans, in that pub…the answer to what’s important was obvious.

To me, the answer to the question”What’s important?” was spending time with Mark, even if it meant turning my back on work and doing something that was not on my top 10 list of things to do on my day off.

 

What is really important?

Firstly, do you even know?  I mean how often do we think about this?

Secondly, if you do know, how often are you honouring what you say is important?  Daily?  Weekly?  Ever?

Former US President Eisenhower is quoted as saying,

“What’s important is seldom urgent and what is urgent is seldom important.”

In his well-known book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen Covey took this concept and gave it to the masses with his Urgent/Important Matrix.

Before I get into this further, imagine for just a moment…

You’re in your office, at your desk inundated by emails, voicemails and interruptions.  You’re handling emergencies as they arise, dealing with the stuff of life – kids, distractions, delivery guy, texts, etc. – the overwhelm kicks in.  At the end of the day you’re probably wondering “what the hell did I accomplish today?”

For many, this is a typical day.  You’ve handled the urgent things that came up unexpectedly and lost sight of the important things.  This is normal;  we live in the world of urgent and forget or postpone what’s important to us.

This narrow view keeps us in a vicious cycle that prevents growth, expansion and any form of risk taking.  It keeps us safe, distracted and yes, a slave to the urgencies of daily life.

With me so far?

Ok, back to Stephen Covey…

So, what do we do?  How do we shift from a mindset addicted to handling the urgent matters to one of prioritising what’s important?

Quadrant 1 – Urgent (top Left)

If your life is one big overwhelm and drama, it’s a good bet that you’re spending way too much time in q

uadrant 1;  urgent tasks that demand immediate attention!

These urgencies are usually not about you;  they’re driven by others and/or circumstances.

• emergencies, complaints, crisis issues
• demands from others
• deadlines, projects, work due NOW
• meetings, appointments
• problem focused, fire-fighting, fixing and changing

Sound familiar?

In this quadrant, there is no relationship to importance and not a whole lot of satisfaction!

Quadrant 2 – Important (top Right)

Ahh…the quadrant of what’s important, what’s possible.  Mostly, we’ve forgotten how great it feels to spend time here.

But here’s the thing – this is where your time and energy is most needed!  It’s all about what you want to d

planning, creating spaceo vs. what you have to or should do.  It’s about your goals, your visions, your hearts’ desires.

• predicting, fine-tuning, designing
• relationship building, getting support
• thinking, creating, modelling what works
• visualizing, anticipating, preparing for the future
• growing, expanding

Hanging out in this quadrant is critical to your success and satisfaction!

Reality check: Where are you spending most of your time?

The bottom-line is there’s no ignoring Quad 1, the urgent stuff of life.  I’m just asking if you really want to live there? Quad 2 ( i.e. your answer to “What’s important?”) is where life feels juicy, and the real work gets done.

There’s a whole strategy to this and I’m not going to lie – it’s not necessarily easy at first – but you’ve got to start somewhere.  Are you going to spend your time and energy on what’s important to you in life or are you going to continue reacting to what other people and life throw at you?

The most obvious way to do this is to work on your priorities first.  I know, I know, you’ve heard it all before.

Over the years, probably just like you, I’ve tried many time management systems, all promising nirvana and freedom from the pressures of time.

News flash: Like pantyhose, there’s no “one-size-fits-all” time management system!

They all work to some degree, so find one that works for you, then work it!

Or create your own; choose the parts that feel good, let go of the rest and give it a whirl.

I start my day with something I rediscovered reading Zen Habits, one of my favourite blogs.  Leo took a familiar concept and chunked it right down to 3 things a day, what he calls your Most Important Tasks.  Just 3 – it’s not rocket science but as he says,  “Sometimes small things can make big differences.”

It takes practice and time, and the more you take on dealing with important things before they whack you upside the head as urgent, the fewer you’ll have to deal with on a daily basis and the more satisfaction you’ll feel.  That’s worth a little effort isn’t it?

So, what’s this got to do with soccer?  Hmm…I mean football!

As I sat in the pub supporting my man and his team, what I was reminded of was this – focusing on what’s important brings us together and creates a bond.

Choosing to spend those few hours with him at the pub was my most important task that day, and how we felt as we walked home together…

You’ll never find that in the land of Urgent.