“The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its own reward.” – Amelia Earhart
The decision to act IS usually the most difficult part of the coaching process. Paper tigers stop us regularly, even when it’s clear they’re made of paper.
Look at the photo. Due to the depth of field, or where the photographer focused, the bars don’t look solid or real. Our beliefs can be like that in reverse. It’s all in our focus or perspective.
The thing that totally jazzes me as a coach is that we really can do most anything we decide to do. The limits are more often in our minds than in reality.
A few examples:
- After years of struggling, a client became crystal clear on what she wanted. Within a year, she bought a condo, changed careers, adopted a baby and began a new relationship.
- A few months into coaching, another client announced she wanted to move to Europe for a year. That was three years ago! She successfully moved, working virtually for her organization in North America. She too, bought a home and had a baby in that time.
- One year after knee surgery, I ran a half marathon, something I’d never imagined possible. Growing up I was the smart one, not the athletic one. The power of my decision to run the race was so empowering, it blew my paper tiger away in a puff of air!
In each example, two things played a major role:
1. Clarity
- What do you really want and why?
- How do you want to feel throughout the process?
2. Commitment
- What do you need to put into place to get started?
- What structures can help you stay focused?
Like the quote says, “the process is its own reward.”
Crossing the finish line at the half marathon was one of the most memorable experiences of my life. But what was even more inspiring was who I had to become during the eight months before.
Every time I went for a run I felt so damn proud of myself. That feeling kept me going and got me out time after time, even during a rainy winter in Vancouver!
I also had support from my physiotherapist, a running group and a friend who followed me in his motorized wheelchair with a timer and a whistle, cheering me on as I ran my long training runs.
The pride and accomplishment that I felt throughout the process still makes a difference to this day. The medal they placed around my neck as I crossed the finish line sits in my desk drawer, an anchor that can change my state instantly.
Your paper tigers are just as made up as the fears my clients and I overcame. You are just as capable of taking action on what you want!
Over to you:
- Where have your paper tigers stopped you?
- Like the photographer, how could you shift your focus?
My paper tigers are growling all around me as I write my first book. The growl is SO familiar, that I’m getting downright bored with it. Yesterday, someone suggested I take the growl (it was “The Voice” yesterday) and put it in my big left toe.
Then she asked me, “Do you really want to listen to what your big left toe is telling you?” It cracked me up so much that the voice disappeared altogether — and apparently reincarnated today as a tiger’s growl instead. Maybe more like a purr.
Years ago, I went on a firewalk and found myself quite literally raising my leg and stepping over an invisible barrier at the head of the firepit before I walked the fire. I felt I was stepping over every fear I had ever had, including the most pressing one I had at the moment — burning the crap out of my feet!
My fear of the fire turned out to be baseless. I try to remember that every time I hesitate and don’t want to walk forward for fear of getting burnt.
Paper tigers purring! Love the image!
Like the fear of the fire, the paper tigers are usually found to be baseless as well. I think that’s why they so kindly dissipate as we start to take action. As you continue writing your book, it’d be fun to experiment with this. When do you hear the growl vs. the purr?