The Vagabondage Series: Elana Baxter steps out from behind the curtain.
I have jumped out of a plane, landing safely in a world of wonder. My head is on straight, and my eyes are open. The limbic lizard previously in charge of the first half of my life has been usurped by a common sense check-in system (Value-O-Meter) that informs me when I’m on or off course.
When the lizard begins to interfere, I check in with reality: we look deeply into each other’s eyes over espresso and all is well with the world. Every day is an opportunity to practice what I’ve learned about myself and what works for me. In other words, I am doing the work that matters and the work that delivers results.
So now what?
The Reveal and the Real
I spend a bit of leisure time indulging in something I cringe to confess, but since I’m out here with my soul flayed like a boneless chicken breast here goes: I watch reality television, in particular the makeover and weight loss themes (hides head under tablecloth).
I haven’t logged huge quantities of time watching the stuff, but I do enjoy it in controlled doses. Now, the thing about the cruelly ironic reality that is so expertly created on programs like the Extreme Makeover franchise or Biggest Loser, and what makes it so addictive and illusory, is that it always delivers.
The formula is well recognized: Bobby and Suzie cry in shame over what messes they’ve made of themselves, admit they are powerless over cheese fries, venti frappuccinos, and donut burgers, henceforth surrendering to the power of weight-loss gurus, personal trainers, and random celebrities. After spending months exercising for a minimum of 4-6 hours a day, and ingesting low-cal delicacies such as romaine lettuce and greek yogurt everyone loses a big ol’bunch of weight, dresses up in their party clothes, and smiles triumphantly on the cover of People, until they fade into oblivion (normal life) or launch a career as a motivational speaker/personal trainer.
I watch these shows, in part because they inspire, but a much bigger part of the reason I watch is to see the end result. I want to see people who have sweat, cried, and fought to reach their goal and be better for all the hard work and personal pain they have endured the same way you and I wish that for ourselves.
The struggle and triumph that typifies the standard makeover reality show is shared by all of us in some way, whether what we wrestle with is physical, emotional, or both. The difference is that real life isn’t a contract with NBC for 10 episodes a year for 10 years, and real life doesn’t follow a script. There is no storyboard, but the one you and I create one day at a time.
As I progress in exploring and practicing what works in my personal recipe for a life worth living, I begin to wonder when my moment will arrive. You know. . .the moment when I can tear through from behind the giant ‘Before’ poster in my designer dress and killer stilettos and show the world what I’m made of.
It’s a moment you and I imagine, maybe consciously, maybe not, where we become that which we so long to be: the successful entrepreneur, the philanthropist, the novelist, the great teacher etc.
I become impatient and start to find fault in everything I am doing, because dammit where is my moment? Until I realize that this is my moment.
Right now.
Every choice and every step forward, none too small, just like every drop of sweat and every leaf of romaine, is our moment.
The ultimate reveal is in every moment.
And we get to own that forever, not just a few seasons.
Coach’s note:
- What have you not acknowledged yourself for?
- If your reveal was today what would you own?
Elena!
I’m with you all the way! It’s sort of energizing to vicariously experience the “success”. “If they can do it…” I need to see people’s processes; what did they do? How did they feel? How can I relate?
I got the chills when you said, “where is my moment? Until I realize that this is my moment.
Right now.” There’s so much power in that! I like to reflect on my life and give myself a pat on the back for staying in the game, taking risks, and just laughing at inappropriate times! Excellent post Elena!
Betsy! So glad you enjoyed the post and could relate to the whole ‘game show’ experience. You’re so on point when you say ” Until I realize that this is my moment”, but we don’t know how to recognize it until we experience it… Susan Piver wrote something great today:
“Fortunately or not, there is no way to learn without bringing something into experience. otherwise, it simply remains information, not wisdom.”
Until we walk the talk, and experience life in every moment, every known adage/wise word/quip and all other manner of great self-helpy advice is just information. Here’s to experiencing life, in all its moments of revelation.
Thanks so much for reading Betsy!
: ) hugs!
Walkin’ the talk provides discomfort, growth and learning and ultimately, a true reveal 🙂
Mother-fiing brilliant. I’m awestruck friend at how you continue unfold. Brilliant writing, fresh and meaningful insights. A-list all the way.
Thanks Leisa. I’m grateful that Elana is willing to share her journey so publicly. She inspires me every week!
Wow! Thanks Leisa! Keep coming back, I love your input and enthusiasm.
Yep, count me in, Elana. One of my guilty pleasures too is reality makeover/weight loss shows. There is something so compelling about transformation, isn’t there? It is downright hypnotizing to watch someone empower herself. It’s even more hypnotizing when that transformation is such an outer one because it makes the transformation that much more obvious. But of course we know the inner transformation is the biggie — the outer doesn’t happen or doesn’t stick around unless there’s been a major inner transformation.
And that’s the key to the reveal in the moment that you are talking about, isn’t it? Looking inside. Noticing, taking in, honoring the inner work, inner changes, inner thoughts, beliefs, attitudes that affect our outer choices and actions. Maybe the reveal isn’t as dramatic as that moment we tear through our Before in our killer stilettos, but it is every bit as profound and life-changing.
Thanks, Elana and Sandi, for such juicy stuff to think and talk about!
You’ve got it 100% Carol. Thanks for reading and adding your wise interpretations to the conversation! : )
And we get to own that forever, not just a few seasons.
That is something I try to remember every day, to cherish these moments and to remember each day is a gift.