The Art of 3D Living

 

3D usually refers to something having three dimensions, ie: width, length and depth.

I’m using 3D to refer to three aspects of life that aren’t usually thrown together. I found myself falling down the rabbit hole exploring them and how you can use them to have a more vibrant 3D experience of life.

3D Living = Death + Dreams + Delight

Death comes knocking when you least expect it, the mother of all wake up calls.

Dreams have a life of their own, sometimes existing in the least hospitable environments.

Delight can happen in any moment of any day, catching your breath, catching you off guard.

Do you live as though you have choice with these three seemingly unrelated bedfellows or do you more often than not find yourself living as a victim of life’s circumstances?

 

1D – Death

You act like you’ll live forever, avoiding the topic of death at all costs.

This looks like head in the sand, someday thinking which usually at some point turns into a litany of why you can’t have what you want.

• Someday. . . I’m going to have my own business, and then I’ll have the money and freedom to live the way I really want BUT right now, I’m stuck at a job I hate with a boss I hate even more and I can’t quit because I’ve got a mortgage, kids, debt, etc.

OR

• Someday…(this used to be one of my faves) when I meet the right person I’m going to have the most amazing relationship and I’ve done all this personal development work and I’ll be ready BUT not right now because I should probably lose some weight and buy a new wardrobe first.

You get the gist right? Someday… maybe…when the time is right, but not now.

It’s about all the amazing things you’ll do when. . . . . . . . . . {fill in the blank}.

The part you need to shake up is that part of you that’s not willing to be responsible for taking the actions required. Picture a child, fingers in their ears, singing “lalalalalalalalalalala” loudly to drown out reality.

Heads-up: Living in lala-land leads to a life of regrets.

Put on your 3D glasses and look at death from a different perspective.

Tip #1 – Look death squarely in the face.

It’s time to write your eulogy – I’m not kidding. I want you to sit down and imagine your funeral. Is it a sad affair or a celebration of life? Look around. Who’s in the room and what are they saying about you?

Now imagine a loved one, standing at the front of the room, full of emotion and appreciation for who you were.

What did they remember most?

What were you known for?

“I’m the one that has to die when it’s time for me to die, so let me live my life, the way I want to.” – Jimi Hendrix

Are you living that life? If not, what’s that one action you could take today that would rock the foundations of your someday thinking?

Want to write a book?

– Connect with other writers, join a writing group, tell a friend, start a blog.

Want to start a business?

– Find like-minded souls, get yourself a mentor, wake up an hour earlier each day to work on it.

Just do it. Do that one thing.

Today. And tomorrow. And so on. It adds up faster than you can imagine.

2D – Dreams

You disrespect your dreams.

This looks like. . .

• talking about your dreams ad nauseam but taking no action
• using your vision boards and mission statements to decorate your space rather than act as tools to engage you
• planning, strategizing, studying, getting ready, waiting for the day your ducks line up in a row (psst, never gonna happen!)

Newsflash: Remember the boy who cried wolf? All talk, no action leads to people no longer listening and a loss of credibility.

3D glasses on? Good, look at your dreams with new eyes.

Tip #2 – Stop replaying and press restart.

If you could live your life over, this time giving your dreams the attention they deserve, what would you do with your precious time?

Think back to when you were a kid, maybe 5, 7, 10 years of age. What did you want to do or be? Grab a sheet of paper and start writing. Jot down all the crazy dreams you had back then.

I wanted to. . .

• • be an artist
  • study history
  • be fluent in many languages (I know 4 but not fluent yet)
  • read every book in the library (this one was vague, but I’ve read a helluva lot of books!)
  • live in New York…Rome…Barcelona
  • travel the world and learn about people and cultures
  • write stories and books that made people think
  • visit every museum and art gallery in the world (not every, but I sure have seen some of the best!)
  • be a chef… own a little bistro where people I love could hang out

(Things I’ve done are in pink.)

“Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it.” – Goethe

Notice how most of these aren’t even that crazy or out there! Now look at your list.

Which one still makes you tingle with excitement?

What could you do right now, today, to give it some lovin’?

Go. Do. It.

 

3D – Delight

You avoid delight as if it was the one thing in the way of solving the world’s problems.

This is a sneaky one because it seems like your attention is on doing good. In my experience, it’s the D most related to victimhood. How can you delight in the world around you when there is so much wrongdoing going on? Who will save the day if you’re off having a good time?

This looks like worry. A whole lot of worry and wringing of hands. And being a martyr.

You can’t delight in life until you…

• stop global warming
• solve world hunger
• end poverty

Yes, I know I’m being a tad facetious, but that’s really what you sound like when you’re stuck in this way of living. It’s exhausting listening to you. People’s eyes glaze over. Heads droop. And you don’t get to make the difference you want to make.

Reality check: NO amount of worry and angst will solve these problems. Worry just gives you a life devoid of joy and appreciation.

Time for the last lens and another view of delight.

Tip #3 – Take your blinders off.

Think of young children They’re not so good at containing themselves. Then, somewhere between 5 and 10, they’re taught the fine art of suppression.

• • Don’t brag.
  • Don’t show off.
  • Don’t have so much fun.
  • Life is SERIOUS, stop fooling around!

God damn it. In a heartbeat, their experience of joy and confidence lessens, delight and enthusiasm are held in check, and they learn to behave.

You were once that young child.

You know how to feel delight. You know how to be present and in the moment.

You know how to look around and notice. . . that brief window of blue sky, a soothing cup of tea, the feeling of grass between your toes.

I’ve been told I exude joy and playfulness.

Really? Do you think I wake up that way?

I do my best to put my attention there, but I’m human…and when I forget, and slip up and feel lousy, I notice where I’ve become fixated. Some days it’s quick and I shift almost instantly. Other days I fight it, but it’s always a choice that I get to make.

It’s a choice YOU get to make.

It’s the art of 3D living.

“Vital lives are about action. You can’t feel warmth unless you create it, can’t feel delight until you play, can’t know serendipity unless you risk.” – Joan Erickson

What will it take for you to remember the delight you once had in life? You can have it again now.

Move through your environment and notice the many things that once delighted you.

Remember what delight,

• feels like (soft skin, velvet, a flower petal)
• smells like (fresh bread, your lover’s scent, freesias)
• sounds like (unabashed laughter, a violin concerto, your fingers flying across the keyboard)

Stop. Notice. Take it all in.

Just be with it.

Your noticing delight in the world has way more impact than obsessing about the world’s problems.

When you feel good, you’re more likely to do good.

When you feel abundant, life will occur in a very different way.

You’ll become more solution focused vs. problem focused and THAT will make the difference you really want to make!

Death.  Dreams.  Delight.

The art of 3D living is a choice.

Why are you doing what you’re doing? Are you living from your heart or other people’s opinions? Are you willing to forgive yourself for not meeting the expectations of yourself and others?

Think of it this way…

You had to go through whatever you’ve gone through to get to this point. You had to go through it all to find your path. How do I know that’s true? If it weren’t you’d have made other choices.

Tear off the blinders and look through your 3D lenses.

In this moment, right now…you have new choices to make.

And I’m right here to help you when you’re ready.