Dear Beloved,
Dear Beloved,
Lately? I haven’t been very good at expressing my love for you. There’s been a lot of make wrong, and judging and assessing going on and it hasn’t been pretty.
I’ve been focused on work and getting things done, mostly noticing what you haven’t accomplished. I’ve thought and said things to you that I would never, ever say to another. I am so…sorry.
When I think of what you’ve been through the past year and a half, I almost swoon with pride. Really I do. I just don’t tell you enough.
I save that for others.
Maybe I think they need it more than you do. You’ve always been so strong, so independant.
Maybe I’m afraid loving you so boldly, publicly will look…weird, self indulgent, uncommon.
But would that be so bad?
Just let me hold your hand for a moment.
Remember how you loved holding hands as a child? Let’s do that now while I whisper sweet somethings in your ear…
I love how,
- You trusted your heart for the first time in so very long and said, “I do.”
- You listened patiently (and sometimes not) for what was next. The pull towards DOING was magnetic, but you kept returning yourself to BEING. Watching you was inspiring.
- You trusted your intuition, more and more, until now? It’s becoming a natural way of being.
- You recommitted to your Self, your dreams, your future – as a woman, a wife, a coach and most recently, a writer.
- You were brave! I could hardly watch when you declared I Am A Writer, even when you weren’t writing, until not writing became unbearable and the words began pouring out of you.
If I could say anything, I’d say:
You are a Shining.
Your being here makes a difference.
And your only job?
Is to keep shining.
Aww, that’s wonderful.
From one S to another, thank you. Between your fudge and my love letter what a great start to the day!
Goosebumps! What an idea, having a loving relationship with yourself! It is too easy to make yourself a self-improvement project and only beat yourself up over the disappointing stuff instead of noticing and loving the god stuff.
What would we be taking out into the world every day if we wrote ourselves a love letter, and celebrated who we are?
That is a great question Anne. What would we taking out into the world? After writing the letter yesterday I’d say I’d be offering a lot more compassion and love, which sometimes falls by the wayside in the busy-ness of life.
You are amazing.
Thank you. Thank YOU.
xoS
What a great letter…AND a great reminder to all of us who are a little too harsh with ourselves. Keep on shining!
jen 🙂
Jen, You are a brilliant photographer. When’s the last time you acknowledged yourself for your journey and talent? We are mostly too harsh with ourselves and I as I wrote the letter I wondered what would transform if we all did this…once in awhile to start, then regularly? Can you imagine? Wow…
BIg grin… very nice! Sending you hugs.
And you should always remember that “Your being here makes a difference.” definitely to me
Hugs
Gayle,
Your presence here makes a difference, every single time you leave a comment. Thank YOU!
Hey, that’s my girl you’re talking about!!!!!!!
Thank You.
Sandidearest.
I read your letter 4 TIMES. (You would have thought you wrote it about me.) Maybe because each time I got happier and happier, and I can’t find anything wrong with that. 🙂
You could have written a 10 page letter, and if it read like that, I would have read – happily – every word.
And I’m so glad it’s here for me to read again whenever I want to. You know just knowing it’s here, makes me smile.
I mean, imagine how I FEEL :-), when someone whom I hold in such high regard, someone whom I feel SO strongly about, someone who I am lucky to call MY friend is paid her proper respects…is recognized for the love that she IS.
I so appreciate you talking about my friend like that.
xoxoK
FYI my lovely friend…
I wrote this letter due to our conversations. You wore me down (in a very good way) with your talk of love, until I couldn’t hold it in anymore and this was the result. For that, I will always be grateful.
xoS
For this letter, I will always be grateful. Here’s to more. (For selfish reasons…either public or private, they spill over!) Probably because when we talk to ourselves, we/they’re so juicy.
xoK
I love this post Sandi; it could have been written from me to me 🙂
I’m not surprised my cosmic twin, especially now that you’ve stepped into a beautiful new role in life! xoS
Sigh. Rare do we see such a beautiful display of affectionate self love.
And it sure took something for me to get to this point! This letter could just as easily been written to you, about you dear Steph. xoS
Sandidearest, I got to thinking about it a little bit more (you know that’s something I appreciate about your writing) and I’m thinking that you also couldn’t stand the idea of someone else not shining because they might not know how to go about it, so you killed that poor proverbial bird with one stone…you gave to yourself and of yourself. And we’re all better for it.
That poor little bird 😉
Whatever the reason, I truly couldn’t stand it anymore and the dam burst. Still trying to catch my breath!
xoS
This breaks my heart and sends me the little shivers…
dear Sandi’s self: I love the way you’ve done all those things too, and then were able to see what they were and use them as an example of how to make this world a so much better and more peaceful place and lovable place.
I think itt’s time for me to start getting better at expressing that love for me too. Maybe the whip can be put away for those days when we go horse and carriage riding… 🙂
Satya,
It broke my heart a little to write it. My whip has been overused for so long and there have been no horses in sight!
What I already love about you is your fierceness. A truly fine commodity to share with the world.
Wow, this is such a beautiful letter =)). It reminds me to be more kind to myself…. thanks for the reminder.
Leslie,
Yes! Be kinder to ourselves. A very good intention!
So blessed I have found your blog. Came over via Nirvana Mama feel at home here.
I’m staying.
Thank you for the meaty posts, the ones I’ve been starving for. I will be camped out here daily.
Alexandra,
Your words touched my heart; thank you. I am happy you’ll be setting up camp here. I love hanging out with amazing people!