“Everything you’re sure is right can be wrong in another place.” – Barbara Kingsolver
Mostly we want to be right more than anything, don’t we?
What happens when you realize you’re not?
Over to you:
- What have you been wrong about?
- What needs to happen now?
There are people in my life that do things that I think are wrong, but then I remind myself that I’m bringing my life experience to the table, so these are actions that are wrong to me, if I were to do them, based on my experience/upbringing. But for them, it’s perfectly normal. It’s a struggle and I’m working on setting boundaries for myself; I ask myself “what’s my role in this situation” before I jump in to “help.”
Love the simple post. Got my brain jumping at 4:56 am.
Kimberly,
That one simple question you ask yourself makes all the difference. Owning our role, our responsibility eliminates a lot of the drama, don’t you think?
There are people in my life that do things that I think are wrong, but then I remind myself that I’m bringing my life experience to the table, so these are actions that are wrong to me, if I were to do them, based on my experience/upbringing. But for them, it’s perfectly normal. It’s a struggle and I’m working on setting boundaries for myself; I ask myself “what’s my role in this situation” before I jump in to “help.”
Love the simple post. Got my brain jumping at 4:56 am.
Kimberly,
That one simple question you ask yourself makes all the difference. Owning our role, our responsibility eliminates a lot of the drama, don’t you think?
A great idea for a weekly blogpost.
Sometimes I am wrong.
Sometimes I am wrong-ish
and sometimes I am not wrong.
I try to be quick to apologise.
I seek to be open minded, and learn.
When I am not wrong and people want to insist
I am wrong it hurts.
Inflicting hurt is wrong.
Stick to the issues.
By the way a great photo what is the source/location?
Jane,
I appreciate your words. The photo was taken in Vancouver. There’s currently a sculpture installation of a series of chairs with sayings such as this. Made me stop and think!
A great idea for a weekly blogpost.
Sometimes I am wrong.
Sometimes I am wrong-ish
and sometimes I am not wrong.
I try to be quick to apologise.
I seek to be open minded, and learn.
When I am not wrong and people want to insist
I am wrong it hurts.
Inflicting hurt is wrong.
Stick to the issues.
By the way a great photo what is the source/location?
Jane,
I appreciate your words. The photo was taken in Vancouver. There’s currently a sculpture installation of a series of chairs with sayings such as this. Made me stop and think!
oh by the way I am janezwords on twitter
oh by the way I am janezwords on twitter
Simple thought provoking post. The marriage counselor my ex and I went to see loved telling us that we had to make a choice: Be right or Be happy.
Thanks Jem. I believe it’s Wayne Dyer who said, “You can be right or you can be happy.” Not always an easy choice, but definitely powerful.
Simple thought provoking post. The marriage counselor my ex and I went to see loved telling us that we had to make a choice: Be right or Be happy.
Thanks Jem. I believe it’s Wayne Dyer who said, “You can be right or you can be happy.” Not always an easy choice, but definitely powerful.
xoSandi, love EVERY.THING about this.
(Catching my breath. Running down here to comment…excited by your thought provocation…I’m a little winded.)
But on my way down here, I did get a chance to catch Jane’s great question about where the photo came from, and thanks so much for taking it and sharing it with us!!! How awesome that this was a series of chairs…Brilliant. Of the sculptor, and of you for taking the picture to use for your *sneak attack.*
(Who would have thought I’d be thanking someone for attacking me?! Glad you wear velvet gloves.)
I ADORE the…”without a doubt.” That the more confident we are that we are wrong, the better off we’ll probably be. And your coupling that with the Kingsolver quote? Genius.
I can’t be right unless everyone else gets to be, too. Which of course to your point can cause some issues with my being right.
I would tell you I have a very open mind (which is why I am a great Ita mediator but would make a lousy President) I really do believe *everyone* (marital company excluded hahahaha!) has a point and that belief can often belabor a decision.
At the same time, I read the quote and saw the picture and thought, it’s not like you could drive a mack truck through my open mind; thank you for that.
What’s that old expression? If everyone in a meeting agrees, then there’s no need for more than one person at the meeting? (Not sure about that though, the person who wrote that could be wrong. Right?!)
You also reminded me of something ironic. (You’re hard at work over here in my brain!)
People who are always trying to impress upon other people how right they are, have more trouble doing so than the people who don’t just admit they are wrong, but are delighted to tell you how wrong they are, and how right you are.
You can imagine how far I get with my 9 yr-old daughter, when I say “Jenna. I was wrong and you were right. Again!” And then tell her why.
I figure since she’s going to make them, I can only hope that she grows up delighting in her own mistakes, too.
Thank You for the eye and brain candy.
And go dry off, you poor thing!
Your fault though, for opening the floodgates.
Which you were so right and kind to do…it’s Your Word Wednesday, y’all!
But before I go, the answer to your questions…
What am I doing wrong?
Keeping someone else from reading this if they don’t know about it.
How am I going to fix it?
RT @devacoaching
xoK
P.S. (Maybe between you and Barbara and the sculptor, my husband will have a better time of things, at least 3/4 of the weeks of the month. That 4th week, it’s all good if I just stay out of prison. Which is a lot easier if he stays quiet, or if he talks it’s just to say “you’re SO right.” That man is the love of my life, and so of course!:-) that’s the one relationship where I’m like a dog with the last “I’m right” bone on earth.)
P.S.S. I’d be sad, but I’d have to understand if you’re completely rethinking the us meeting someday thing. I think a picture is only supposed to be worth a 1000 words. My bad.
Although as you contemplate, please remember who put out the call for words, and consider this outpouring to be compliments of you.
Karen,
Your humour (as wacky as it is) makes my lil ol’ heart sing. Thank YOU for sharing YOUR words. This is what I imagined when I thought of the idea. This is what I could spend the rest of my life talking about. This conversation is my bliss. Honestly.
Mark took that photo for me, and like you shared about your husband, he’s the one who gets my righteousness more than most. What I give so easily to others, is a challenge in my most intimate relationship. I think that’s where the prompt came from as I searched for a photo yesterday.
Thanks for making me think even further about the image. And you’re wrong you know 😉 I now want to meet you more than ever. Soul sister.
xoS
Karen,
Your humour (as wacky as it is) makes my lil ol’ heart sing. Thank YOU for sharing YOUR words. This is what I imagined when I thought of the idea. This is what I could spend the rest of my life talking about. This conversation is my bliss. Honestly.
Mark took that photo for me, and like you shared about your husband, he’s the one who gets my righteousness more than most. What I give so easily to others, is a challenge in my most intimate relationship. I think that’s where the prompt came from as I searched for a photo yesterday.
Thanks for making me think even further about the image. And you’re wrong you know 😉 I now want to meet you more than ever. Soul sister.
xoS
What a wonderful photograph and perfect for this post!
This morning my husband was trying to tell me about a LAN party his friends were having on a weekend he was scheduled to work Sunday. I cut him off because I didn’t want him to be away all Friday night and Saturday too.
We got really snippy at each other and then he left for work. I should have listened to him instead of cutting him off. I do that too much. He told me later he was sorry for how he acted, but he feels disrespected when I cut him off. I apologized for my behavior as well.
I think it’s important to admit when you’re wrong; communicate that and move forward.
Lynda,
Being responsible, admitting when you’re wrong, saying “Hey, I screwed up”…it’s not rocket science and some days it’s really a challenge isn’t it? It’s also what makes the biggest difference allowing us to move forward!
What a wonderful photograph and perfect for this post!
This morning my husband was trying to tell me about a LAN party his friends were having on a weekend he was scheduled to work Sunday. I cut him off because I didn’t want him to be away all Friday night and Saturday too.
We got really snippy at each other and then he left for work. I should have listened to him instead of cutting him off. I do that too much. He told me later he was sorry for how he acted, but he feels disrespected when I cut him off. I apologized for my behavior as well.
I think it’s important to admit when you’re wrong; communicate that and move forward.
Lynda,
Being responsible, admitting when you’re wrong, saying “Hey, I screwed up”…it’s not rocket science and some days it’s really a challenge isn’t it? It’s also what makes the biggest difference allowing us to move forward!
When I’m wrong, it’s my ego that’s burning… you could see it glowing through my cheeks!
A saying that’s been on my mind lately: possibly related:
“he speaks who knows not, while he who knows speaks not.”
Well I think I jazzed up the grammar but anyway…
I can totally relate; I know I speak more when I’m trying to prove I’m right!
I’ve come to a point in my professional life where I usually end an explanation or opinion-discussion with the caveat “but I could be wrong, it’s entirely possible.” Making an incorrect statement isn’t necessarily the end of the world; having too much pride to accept the fact that I’m human and can and WILL make mistakes is.
I am wrong. Won’t be
the end of my world. You’ll see
Life continues on.
Haha, after “it’s entirely possible” I know I’ve sometimes muttered under my breath, “but highly unlikely!” The attachment to being right is like a magnetic pull!
When I’m wrong, it’s my ego that’s burning… you could see it glowing through my cheeks!
A saying that’s been on my mind lately: possibly related:
“he speaks who knows not, while he who knows speaks not.”
Well I think I jazzed up the grammar but anyway…
I can totally relate; I know I speak more when I’m trying to prove I’m right!
I’ve come to a point in my professional life where I usually end an explanation or opinion-discussion with the caveat “but I could be wrong, it’s entirely possible.” Making an incorrect statement isn’t necessarily the end of the world; having too much pride to accept the fact that I’m human and can and WILL make mistakes is.
I am wrong. Won’t be
the end of my world. You’ll see
Life continues on.
Haha, after “it’s entirely possible” I know I’ve sometimes muttered under my breath, “but highly unlikely!” The attachment to being right is like a magnetic pull!
First of all, The Poisonwood Bible is one of my favorite books of all time and the ideal book to introduce the idea of right vs. wrong is kind of in the mind of the beholder, no?
I pride myself on admitting when I’m wrong. I very rarely make a statement unless I know for ‘sho I’m right about it. I usually prefece the statement with ” I think it’s this way.” But what REALLY irritates me is when I make a statement and someone asks me if I’m sure and I say yes, absolutely and they don’t believe me! ARgggg
There are so many aspects to explore in this conversation of right and wrong. It’s like peeling back the layers of an onion!
First of all, The Poisonwood Bible is one of my favorite books of all time and the ideal book to introduce the idea of right vs. wrong is kind of in the mind of the beholder, no?
I pride myself on admitting when I’m wrong. I very rarely make a statement unless I know for ‘sho I’m right about it. I usually prefece the statement with ” I think it’s this way.” But what REALLY irritates me is when I make a statement and someone asks me if I’m sure and I say yes, absolutely and they don’t believe me! ARgggg
There are so many aspects to explore in this conversation of right and wrong. It’s like peeling back the layers of an onion!
I have been wrong about who I am and who I am meant to be.
I have measured myself against what others said that they see.
I have sold myself short and not reached to the skies,
because I believed what turned out to be lies.
Once I decided to uncover who I was meant to be,
I have found myself greater than imagined by me.
Love. Your. Words.
Thank you!
I have been wrong about who I am and who I am meant to be.
I have measured myself against what others said that they see.
I have sold myself short and not reached to the skies,
because I believed what turned out to be lies.
Once I decided to uncover who I was meant to be,
I have found myself greater than imagined by me.
Love. Your. Words.
Thank you!
For me its simple – being wrong and recognising it, admitting it and reflecting on being wrong is all part of perfecting the character.
The character is who you are to the world, the world sees your character.
Do I make sense or have I made a mistake in what I have said 😉
I understand and prefer the word authenticity to character. When I am wrong and acknowledge it that is authentic for me. It’s a feeling of ownership and responsibility that works vs. trying to make myself understood or persisting.
For me its simple – being wrong and recognising it, admitting it and reflecting on being wrong is all part of perfecting the character.
The character is who you are to the world, the world sees your character.
Do I make sense or have I made a mistake in what I have said 😉
I understand and prefer the word authenticity to character. When I am wrong and acknowledge it that is authentic for me. It’s a feeling of ownership and responsibility that works vs. trying to make myself understood or persisting.
Wrong is the gray in a black and white world.
I do not like to be wrong.
But, when I realize I am, I freely admit it and then move on.
I have been meaning to stop by your blog since starting the 31DBBB Challenge and I am so glad that I stopped by today.
Can’t wait to come back. I like the way you make me think.
Thanks Kelly; I agree with the grayness of wrong! I don’t think any of us like to be wrong, but there’s so much freedom available when we simply say, “I $%^ up and I’m sorry”
Wrong is the gray in a black and white world.
I do not like to be wrong.
But, when I realize I am, I freely admit it and then move on.
I have been meaning to stop by your blog since starting the 31DBBB Challenge and I am so glad that I stopped by today.
Can’t wait to come back. I like the way you make me think.
Thanks Kelly; I agree with the grayness of wrong! I don’t think any of us like to be wrong, but there’s so much freedom available when we simply say, “I $%^ up and I’m sorry”
This post reminds me of a quote I heard a while back, “When given the choice between being right and being kind, choose to be kind”.
Stopping by from 31DBBB.
Bekah,
Can you imagine a world if we all followed your quote’s example?
This post reminds me of a quote I heard a while back, “When given the choice between being right and being kind, choose to be kind”.
Stopping by from 31DBBB.
Bekah,
Can you imagine a world if we all followed your quote’s example?
What was I wrong about? That being a mom wouldn’t change me. For the most part, I’m still the same person I was before the little man. But the role and importance that my career takes in my life has changed radically, especially as of late.
btw, thanks for sharing your thoughts on my page today. Enjoyed hearing your point of view. 🙂
You reminded me that I was wrong thinking that marriage wouldn’t change me. Good think I have a sense of humour!
What was I wrong about? That being a mom wouldn’t change me. For the most part, I’m still the same person I was before the little man. But the role and importance that my career takes in my life has changed radically, especially as of late.
btw, thanks for sharing your thoughts on my page today. Enjoyed hearing your point of view. 🙂
You reminded me that I was wrong thinking that marriage wouldn’t change me. Good think I have a sense of humour!
Ah this image must have been picked for me! I had a little situation yesterday in work. I was wrong. Actually I did something wrong. I made a mistake. An error of judgment. I was called in to talk to the General Manager. Before I went in, I started preparing what I was going to say and then I though “No, I don’t need to prepare, all I need to do is be honest”. I listened to her take on it (not good), I explained where I was coming from, I expressed how I was feeling and I talked about what I had learned from the experience.
While my manager started off with a hard-line approach i.e. I was in trouble. By the end of the discussion we were talking about my career development and future progression.
I learned that if you have the right attitude to getting something wrong – it actually turns out alright!
Brilliant example Laura; thanks for sharing it!
Ah this image must have been picked for me! I had a little situation yesterday in work. I was wrong. Actually I did something wrong. I made a mistake. An error of judgment. I was called in to talk to the General Manager. Before I went in, I started preparing what I was going to say and then I though “No, I don’t need to prepare, all I need to do is be honest”. I listened to her take on it (not good), I explained where I was coming from, I expressed how I was feeling and I talked about what I had learned from the experience.
While my manager started off with a hard-line approach i.e. I was in trouble. By the end of the discussion we were talking about my career development and future progression.
I learned that if you have the right attitude to getting something wrong – it actually turns out alright!
Brilliant example Laura; thanks for sharing it!
So many things I could list and way too many. More often than not, when I listen to and then follow, the Lizard Brain. What needs to happen then? …..ART.
So many things I could list and way too many. More often than not, when I listen to and then follow, the Lizard Brain. What needs to happen then? …..ART.